Stress Center Peer Support

Hi I'm stressing so much about a relationship I'm in with my girlfriend i have had anxiety before I was with her and I meet her when I felt kinda okay but my anxiety got worse.. Now my mind has told myself that it is my girlfriend causing me to feel like this because I feel like I'm forcing myself to be in this relationship. I love talking to her she's always there for me but like I get anxiety just talking to her and being with her I've distant myself from her so much.. I don't know if I love her or I do my mind has confused me I just wanna stop thinking about it I'm constantly thinking about it all day.. There is times where I do wanna hang out with her but its not all the time and I've broken up with her cause I told her it was my anxiety making me feel like this about her.. But then I start to miss or something and I start crying and then I call her and we talk and I feel better but then the next day I get anxiety when I think of her.. And then I question everything like why? I'm tired of feeling like this about her she's done nothing but good for me but I can't like stop having bad thoughts about her or not have anxiety about her and it drives me crazy!!! All day I think of this and I can't talk myself out of it.. Maybe my anxiety is telling me I don't want to be her but I can't accept it its like I wanna work things out with her I wanna get better with her cause she's done nothing but help me out.. But like why do I get anxiety when I think it her or being with her? Its a bad feeling like I don't know if I wanna be with her.. Sometimes I feel better alone but then I don't wanna be alone and I start missing her and I cry and get her back its like I can't get my mind off it or her.. Idk what to do has anybody have any advice?

Thanks, Danny

Hi Danny,

Thank you for writing and reaching out.

May I ask if there is a fear of failure? Fear of having to provide as a husband or father?

We all tend to be obsessive thinkers so anytime we are in circular thinking I recommend we journal.
I would write out what I want to control and why I want to control it.
Once I can identify that then I journal 5-10 lies and truths.
Finally I just focus on the truths and keep them with me. I write them out or put them in my phone.
Obsessive thinking needs to be paused quickly and then you must move your thoughts into truth quickly as well.

I hope that helps.
I look foward to your reply.
I pm'd you back too. '
Coach Chris