Question about control

[ellenfisher]

I would like to do the work in the program around making a list of things I can control and things I can't. I am personally having a hard time with this. What about the influence I have with family and friends-is that a portion of control or not? Maybe not, maybe it's just suggestions or comments-but they control their choices to receive my imput or not? What about persuasive argument though, what about personalities in history that have controlled portions of countries populations by their propoganda--is that control? Can we not control others under the right conditions? I don't want to be doing that anymore with any negative manipulation of any sort.

I really want to let go of the control issues that have been my habit throughout my life, but I think I may need to understand what I'm really letting go of if I am going to be able to adopt the new way of thinking.

Thanks for any positive input.

Ellen

[tina martin]

Your interesting questions are some I did not even understand until now, late in life. Control is a big, big issue. The general approach I try to follow now is that I can only control my reaction to others. Control and power go together including those personalities in history you allude to.

Not sure if this addresses your issue, having tried to think about it. But I can say that I try to give freedom to those around me and do my best to preserve my own.

[ellenfisher]

Tina,

Thanks! I'm giving it some thought and finding a lot of truth in the fact that others, like myself control themselves.

I'm not sure how it works under certain circumstances in history or with specific effective manipulation tools, but (I had to laugh at myself for a bit of "overthinking it" ) none of that applies to me or my life so I can just control me and let others control themselves and that's freeing.

Again, thanks,

Ellen

[tina martin]

You are so welcome, Ellen, and, in fact, I really ought to thank you for saying the magic word, "freeing."

When we can be free on the inside of those anxieties, fears, etc. that seek to own us and people around us who sometimes also have their own aims, well, with freedom we can hope to find the peace and calm we seek.