Stress Center Peer Support

Hi,its been a while since I have been on here. Not sure if some members remember me. I have come a long way
over this past year. Last year I could barely get out of bed. I used to cry and always thought my life was over. My fiance would go to Jersey to visit his mother and I would never go and I used to be so upset that he would leave me. We wound up moving to Jersey with his mom and we now have our own place in Jersey. I drive now go places by myself and am not so scared to leave the house. Over the past few months my unemployment has run out and we have been struggling financially. I am trying to get approved for disability but it is taking forever. I recently got a part time job that I am going to start this Monday, This has always been my biggest fear going back to work. This is like the ultimate test for me of whether I really do have a better grip on my anxiety. My fear is that I will not be able to handle it and I will have to quit. My main concern is about the 2 week training, it is an hour drive each way and the hours are from 9-5. All the what ifs are in my head like what if im there and i start having symptoms and cant drive home. What if I get in that slum again where I cant get out of bed and these people will be relying on me and I cant go. I just dont know what to do. I dont want to let the anxiety win but I dont want to let people down that will be relying on me either. Anyone have symptoms at work and how do you deal?

Blynbee - Congratulations on getting the part time job!! You really have come a long way. That is wonderful. Remind yourself of that. YOU HAVE COME A LONG WAY! I'm pretty sure you will not go back. Your mind and body may feel like there is nowhere to go but to the "anxious place" but that's because you did get so used to it.

I remember years ago I had to fly from NY to IL for training....with panic. It was lovely. (insert sarcasm) The home office was a really big place so I decided to find my safety zones. The bathroom was always a great place for that. If I felt something coming on I just excused myself and would pull myself together in there. Splashing cold water on my face, positive self talk and telling myself that I would be ok. That little break was very helpful. Someone notice I went to the bathroom a lot and said something, but what the heck. I just told myself she obviously just a rude person. LOL. Remember that you are in control and find your safe places...whether it's the bathroom or the car or both.

Good luck to you and Congratulations again!!

Wow! What an encouraging story!! To go from bedridden to where you are now!! Try to remember that you are in a better place now and it's ok to feel anxiety, but to keep doing what you know you need to do! You overcame the pit and you won't go back there as long as you keep fighting the fight as the program has taught!! I am still in the "scared to get out of bed because of physical symptoms" stage, but am seeing a little progress each day ... so to read your story was a good reminder to me that we can overcome this!! Take care!