Stress Center Peer Support

I'm going to meet a friend for lunch today and it's amazing how I'm actually anxious. i don't see her often but have known her forever. I"m not anxious like i am about my doc appt next week but i'm still anxious. it just seems so silly, i remember when i was a teen when i was going to see a friend i didn't think twice about. now i have to actually calm myself down to do anything social. maybe i'm being to hard on myself but i just get so irritated with myself for being anxious over what seems like ANYTHING out of my daily routine. Anyone else feel this way about getting together with a friend?

Carol, don't be to hard on yourself. I feel the same way. I get anxious about doing "social" type things also!! I didn't realize until recently, but often I will even find an excuse as to why I can't. Sometimes ahead of time, sometimes not until it's time to walk out the door. Lately when I start anticipating those types of things, I try to think of other times I was anxious about something but did it anyway, and turned out I was very glad to have done it. I also like listening to a session on my way to do whatever it is. Just know you are not alone, and the more you do it, the better it gets!! You can feel comfortable again in social situations!! (I am not fully there, but well on my way )

Thanks so much. I think your right, i just need to keep going out and doing it. I really like the idea of listening to the tapes, i can't do it on my way but can do it at home before hand. I think my biggest fear is embarrassing myself in some way, but i need to keep telling myself it's not a big deal EVEN IF i did something to embarrass myself is that really the end of the world. I'll keep at it.

Yes if you can't listen on the way, I'm sure before hand is just as good. I know that is part of it for me, I often think I will say something stuiped or something along those lines. I try to remember, someone mentioned to me a while back, out of all the time you spend with people most often is the case, that what you say is not remember, but the feeling they had when with you!! or something along those lines...

That's exactly it, even if we do something embarrassing or say something stuiped.... SO WHAT!!! As you said the world will not end. I think a lot of the time, we are normally the only ones that even notice the embarrassing things or stupid things. And when we are not, that is what makes us human, the ability to make a mistake, do something embarrassing, being "okay" with it is what makes it easier, sometimes maybe even funny

ur right, that's true I don't remember most of what is said after the fact it's more the feeling. i like that somewhere along the line i decided i needed act perfect or no one would like me. i really just need to be myself and let the chips fall where they may. thanks again for the input.

You are most welcome So did you make it and how was it?

it was good. i little strange for both of us, but nice. glad I got to see her and plan on getting together again. So all in all it was a good thing.

Hi Ladies,
So glad to read all your comments, I have had the same feelings myself & for the last 2 or 3 years have just hid in my room not going anywhere or being with anyone. I started going to Curves a year ago and enjoyed the ladies there, but I wasn't losing any weight or inches after 2 months of trying. I also went to "Zumba" classes on Saturdays & I really enjoyed it, but for some reason I just stopped going. Don't ask me why, cause I really don't know the real reason. I am 63 years young & live with my daughter & her husband & 3 children for the past 3 years. My trying to stay out of the families way was seen by them as wasting my life away & it broke their hearts. I use to be so outgoing, funny & just plane old fun to be around. I'm really not sure what happened, it just did. We have had our talks about my situation & they want me to get out & do things. My daughter saw a senior gathering notice in the newspaper & it is at a near by restaurant where there will be dinner & dancing. I have decided to attend. Just put myself out there, I don't know anyone but it's a great chance to meet new people. I have been working on my anxious feelings all week, it seems to be working cause I am happy about attending. I will let you know how it goes.
I'm so happy that I found this program, I'm only on lesson 3 and I'm trying to do everything they suggest because I need so desperately to change my way of thinking about myself & others. I hope everyone is doing fine today. . . I'll check with you all later. Have a great day!
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