Stress Center Peer Support

Hi I'm Jake,
I " tried " this program like 10 - 15 years ago.I say " tried " because I have ADD and started the program and only went part-way through it ( ADD symptom - starting things and not finishing them ). Anyway, I have had treatment resistant depression and general anxiety disorder all my life especially in social situations.No medication or therapy has ever helped me for any significant length of time.So,it's been trial and error with the meds but really just error. Well,I'm gonna try again.Only this time I'm gonna really commit myself to MAKING it work for me this time.But I know I can't do it by myself.But I believe I am on my own to do whatever I need to do to get better and take my life back.I am depressed and anxious all the time with frequent mood swings.And if there's a moment when I'm not anxious,my mind will,against my best efforts, search for something to feel/be anxious about.I do have some hope in this program.I am trying to believe I can really get to a place where I can actually feel good about myself and feel comfortable around people.Depression has just enveloped me and, coupled with fear and doubt all my life, it's been so hard to accomplish anything or to be consistent with any efforts to make permanent changes in my life.Happiness seems like such a foreign concept to me.I often wonder if life for me will ever be the way it seems to be for other people. Hope somebody can relate and has some helpful feedback.

Jakesteel, I can TOTALLY relate. I have suffered with anxiety and depression as far back as I can remember. My mood swings are ridiculous. I am on my 2nd attempt in the program as well. Although my 1st was only about a year ago. I never got diagnosed as a kid but always grew up thinking I had ADHD. And even more so when it was mentioned to be in my eldest son. (I have not/will not get him tested either) But I heard Lucinda mention something about often children are diagnosed with ADD/ADHD only to find out it was really anxiety and depression. So now I wonder if it was more just that. But anyway. I to often wonder if I will ever be/feel "normal/happy" I did get to session 7 on my 1st attempt though and I did see some changes. I am really starting to beleive as Lucinda shows it's really about what we think and tell ourselves. Once we can start to see/change that things will really start to look better. It does take A LOT of determination, practice, patience, etc. but you can do it if you really put your mind to it. If you want it enough it can be!

Keep me posted on your progress. I will try to help in anyway I can, even if just to listen!

Welcome, Jake. You've come to a good place. The program has great potential from what others have posted and my knowledge and confidence in CBT (Cognitive Behavior Therapy). Reality is: there are no quick fixes; there is no free lunch. However, with effort, concentration, persistence, patience, things can change for you. Remember you are an active partner in improving. Stick with it and keep us posted.

Wishing you the best. Here to try and support you.

Hey iwillbebetter and tina martin,
I read some of your posts for others just before I posted.So,I can see you are both active participants in other people's lives as well as your own.Thanks so much for your responses.Yea,you know,no matter what books I've read or what CD's I've listened to over the years ( Anthony Robbins,Zig Ziglar,Joel Osteen,etc.,etc.- there've been so many - including my own therapists,which have also been many ) they all come back to thoughts.I mean all this "stuff" becomes a part of my thinking and my beliefs ,and that so subtly,I don't even realize it until after I'm already into it.So,yea,this has to be the area where I need to change the most and from which everything else I learn/relearn will grow." those who spread sunshine into the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves." thanks again.to be continued

Yes I think being "active" in others lives can also help to assist in your own. It's amazing the things you can think of, especially when for someone else.
I think support is a big part of healing, no matter if you need the support or are there to give, everyone can grow and gain so much from it!!

yup.Its something I loose track of from time to time but its comforting to know theres someone else out there who knows and understands what I'm goin through because they have gone/are goin through the same thing.I also know I need to somehow strike a balance between intense desire to get better and do better yesterday,and being patient with myself and working the program a little at a time.It's like I have a lot of drive to succeed but yet I know I need to be patient.This puts me in kind of a bind.

I know what you mean. It can be very hard to find that "balance" I recall especially my 1st time in the program. It seemed in every session after a week I felt I had to move on to the next. After each session I was never "happy" with my progress. I know I had progressed, but it was never as far as I "thought" I should. I'm sure that probably had something to do with me not completing it.... This time I try to not even think about it at all. As far as where I am where I should be etc. If I feel I need to listen to a session a few extra times before I move on, why not? who is it really gonna hurt if I do?

ahhh well It's a bit past my bed time, off to bed I go.

* happy happy joy joy *

Jake -- Just thought I would check in and see how you are doing? I hope all is well

hey iwillbebetter,
thanks for checkin up on me.Yea someone ran into us back on 11/27,nobody hurt but ive been having to spend alot of time battling with the ins. co. to try n get the car fixed.im trying to hold onto the program. i mean trying not to let go of it again because of getting immersed in a world of distractions. hope you are doin well

Ahhh yes I know what a pain insurance companies can be. I also know how easy it can be to get lost in the world distractions, but just think/remember of how much easier those distractions will be to handle once you have completed the program. I am actually doing pretty good this time around. I've made some amazing realizations. I've got a lot of hope at the moment. Well if there is anything I can do to help you "stay with the program"..... Something someone said the other day in a post spoke volumes to me....

It's not the speed you go, but the direction that counts!