Stupid Me! I SMOKED TODAY!!!

[King Peace]

I stopped smoking over a month ago. It was my relapse from what would have been 6 years smoke free. TODAY I PURCHASED A PACK OF CIGARETTES AND SMOKED AGAIN!! I AM SO DEPRESSED! I have had a lot of anxiety due to 2.4 years of unemployment, family problems, and my family being away for a few weeks. I DON'T WANT TO SMOKE AGAIN!!! HELP!!!!!

[Loveslife]

OK. You smoked today.
I will try to help you. Do you know what triggered you to relapse? We should try to address the root cause and then go from there.
Also, do you think that if you throw away your cigarettes you will be strong enough to resist?
I think you must discover the root cause of the relapse. Was some kind of fear involved? Fear or anxiety of some sort? I find that fear is the usual culprit, but can be difficult to uncover....

[King Peace]

Thank you for the response. Yes, I did throw out my pack. I can't afford to smoke again. I have been unemployed for over 2 years! My family went away or a few weeks. That's when the temptation started. Also, I smelled smoke on someone the other day. But I am a roller coaster of worry, depression and anxiety. There's a lot going on and not going on in my life. I guess I had several triggers.

[samcat]

King Peace,

Please don't call yourself stupid because you had a relapse. As they say in the Sam Obitz book, "So what?" You had one bad day of human frailty. One of the program's key tenets is to love yourself. If your friend did this, you would tell him that it was just one day, just one mistake and now he has quit again. That is what you should tell yourself. The other writer made very good points about trying to analyze why you fell to the temptation so you can avoid doing it again. I just wanted to tell you we are all in the same boat and we all do things that we regret, but don't beat yourself up for it. You recognized your error and corrected it. That shows good sense and courage.

[Faith_TX]

I've been there recently too. And the fact that you didn't get the pleasure you were looking for only guilt and feeling bad will probably be enough to keep you from doing it again.

I'd quit for 12 years and started a year ago but then quit about a month ago. This weekend I took two puffs off a cigarette. It tasted nasty. I was really glad it tasted nasty because now I don't want to do it again. Sometimes we have to do something to remind ourselves why we quit.

Hang in there. . .

[Loveslife]

HI,
I'm just checking in to see how you are doing with the NOT smoking.
I hope you are having a better day...

[King Peace]

I appreciate everyone's support on this thread. You're all wonderful!
I called my states quit smoking hotline today. The person on the other end of the phone was a big help. She reinforced my resolution to stay off those dangerous dirty, smelly cigarettes.

[Loveslife]

Great job being proactive!!!

[Faith_TX]

Yay that's awesome that there is a help line! WTG!!

[King Peace]

I am sorry to say I am smoking again. This evening I got so stressed and so week that I bought another pack of cigarettes. I even called the hotline today to get reinforcement. I guess it's time to get on my knees and pray to God for help. I should give my life back to Him. I need His help. I know I will stop. I also binged on sugar.