Stress Center Peer Support

I went to the oral surgeon today for a checkup and i embarassed myself with my anxiety. I got into the waiting room i feel uneasy, i go to sign a paper and take another xray i feel even more uneasy and drawn back from people. I go into the small room with this guy and the walls feel like their closing in on me and everything seems small. My body starts hurting like it did when i got into the car ride since i still have to close my eyes while riding in the passenger seat from the wreck im still not over.
Though my nerves or veins feel like they are squeezing very tight and i'm sitting in the chair trying to answer his questions and he started joking trying to make me calm which didn't work.. he took my bp and it was very high just hearing how fast it was beating made me scared then he told me he doesn't want me to pass out because he doesn't want to pick me up from the ground if i do... that made me get up and leave the room because i felt scared like i was going to pass out right after he said it.

I'm in the back of the room with no people in the dark and this nice lady comes and sits down trying to help me get through this appointment with questions and i try to calm down explaining my anxiety the best way i can hoping to god they understand. Then the oral surgeon comes in and she seems very calm and nice so i answer her questions and explain to her and i finally get xanax like my old psychiotrist perscribed to me before i had to get off all medication. She schedueled for next week since my sleeping patterns are sleep in day and stay up at night.. After talking to her the anxiety calmed down but riding back in the car still made my nerves feel like their squeezing a little and they still feel like it now even though i am safe at home. I still feel anxious bad from today with dizziness, headache, tmj, and wisdom teeth pain. I came home feeling stupid and ashamed because i felt i made a fool of myself.

I know it was hard to control and stop my body from shaking but i did try and it just happened .. doing this is so hard to try to concentrate on good things when my body has these symptoms .. my blood pressure scared me & my nerves feeling like someone i pinching them did as well. I hope when the surgery comes for them to remove the wisdom teeth i don't freak out. My anxiety is far more worse to worry about than the extraction.

Hey xlostgirlx,

Don't be so hard on yourself. You DID go and you DID try - that counts for something! I can't even get my husband to go to the dentist for a cleaning and he doesn't even battle anxiety. He's just scared of the dentist! So, I think you did great for trying. Hope the xanax will help you for when you have to go back.

The xanax will help! I have days like that. I went to get a massage and talked and talked to her like she was my psychiatrist or something. I felt like an idiot when I left but I went back again last week and everything went fine. I just decided not to talk this time. She probably thinks I'm weird but she gets paid either way.
Going to the oral surgeon is not exactly a relaxing thing even for someone with no anxiety problems. Hey you'll be knocked out for the surgery and won't even remember leaving the office if you're anything like my kids. I have worked in the medical field all my life and I can assure you the way you acted was nothing unusual to them. I've seen it all and I'm sure they have too!

Hi there XLOSTGIRLX,
I do the EXACT same thing at the dentist! It is embarrassing, and that makes people like us feel that much worse, or like a failure, right? Well, don't worry yourself too much about it for now... when Debi says that they've seen it all, she's right... take a little solace in that and remember it for your next appointment.

Just so you know you aren't alone in your loss of control at the dentist office, no matter how hard I try not to, I always cry in the dentist chair... HOW EMBARRASSING!!! Fortunately I have FINALLY found a dental office full of folks who have listened to me when I said, "I'm scared of the dentist"... of course they behaved like they would for most patients, but when I stood in the corner of the room, behind my husband and said "Noooo, I am so terrified right now"... they worked with me and I got through the check up without having to throw up, even tho' I did cry.
Hang in there!!!
K~

I got this exercise a couple adays ago in my DBT class at the clinic I belong to and I thought you'd like to hear the results of it.
The Forgiveness Inventory Exercise.
1.Make a list of those persons you wish to forgive who you find it very hard not to:
Ok here goes....
My Ex wife, Joy
Threasa
The Doctors In Charge of my Sister Anna
Step-Father Pat
2.Spend sometime on your list.
OK here goes....
Joy my Ex didn't realize she was distancing herself from me and that our relationship was dying 'cause she wanted...No needed to be a Robin Hood character out and about saving those who were worse off than us so she could feel better about herself. I was there but I was to depressed to doing anything to stop her from ruining our relationship by burying my head in the sand and telling myself that everything was all right. Which of course it wasn't. So once the doctors diagonsed me with Manic Depression and then told me that unless I change things in my life this condition would be the end of me. So I divorce her and this started my destroying the Co-Dependency relationship I started with my family of origin and continued with her. So with this exercise I realize now that she did my a great service in breaking this habit and getting my life back for the first time in my life.
Threasa
I really didn't like the way she behaved at Hospies when she raised a big stink at the staff there that they should give something leahal to my dying brother her husband so she could collect on the Insurance Money that would be coming her way once he was dead. And yet it has taken me a long time to stop hating her for this because I feel she helped to pound in the nails to his premature coffin when she ran up all their bills the ones he couldn't pay. But in order to free me from this terrible rage that burns deep in my soul I have to let this matter go and know that she will be judged for her actions not by me but by God.
The Doctors In Charge of my Sister Anna
who in my opinion are dragging their feet testing people who could possibly give her a kidney that will save her from my brother's fate. You see everyone in my clan except me have recieved a Kidney Disease that was on my father's side of his genes. So Anna, my little sister is waiting patently to get somebodies kidney. But no matter how loud I scream for them to test me they just keep on testing everybody else. She tells me that they want to make sure they don't make a mistake by testing too quickly. But I'm afraid that by the time they get to me she'll be too weak to survive the operation. She just told my mom that because of her high blood pressure she's either in for a stroke or she's going to go blind soon. And so I have to watch as my sibblings die and I can't do a thing to stop it. But I can stop blaming her doctors because I don't know all the facts I'm not one of them. So I'm letting the anger go.
Step-Father Pat
Who I bitterly hate. I watched how before his death from Lung Cancer he almost bankrupted him and my mom with his Gambling Addiction. Because like me he had a Drunken Master of a father figure who convinced him that he would never amount to anything unless he was RICH! So he spent a huge amount of his retirement on his gambling. But died before he could sell their home and leave her and me homeless.
But you know what I learned a great deal from this man that you can be a somebody who is dirt poor as long as you can learn to be a somebody to yourself. And this is the message I am passing on to all of you in the program. This is what the program taught me. Without it I'd still be knocking myself out to be a Richman to prove to my dead dads and everyone else that I am a somebody. Yes, I am as long as I can look at myself in the mirror and be proud of the person I'm looking at.
What more can you possibly ask for besides that?
Enough said.
Thanx.

Thank you all for your replies it always helps to see what others have gone through and their oppinions and suggestions. It really does help me out a lot thank you so much.