Stress Center Peer Support

How does one deal and cope with the overwhelming responsibilities it takes to run a whole household alone? I have no bi-ped children but we have a lot of fuzzy, feathery, scaley kiddos and it is alot to care for now that my boyfriend found a job on the road. I find with taking care of them, just feeding them and giving them fresh water...not including bathing or cleaning them or cages...and feeding and bathing myself, is MORE than I am able to cope with. How does one fit any of the other chores in there without LOSING THEIR MINDS? I start to get anxiety attacks as I am trying to do this. How do I cope with the " daily have-to's" and fit some of the "occasional have-to's" in there?
I do find that most attacks have the underlying.."what will someone think when they see that just this is overwhelming and a struggle to do? Not too mention what will someone think that I can't keep house perfectly?"

Also have lots of anxiety about how to manage time effectively..that is part of the problem to managing this menagerie. I LOVE all my "kiddo's" but feel overwhelmed. One would not get rid of their human children..as I would not think to get rid of these "kids". There has to be a way a making this manageable and coping better.

Any suggestions or insights welcome.

Are you a list maker? I have 4 human kids, a husband and a dog. I have a calendar with big squares that show only 1 week at a time, and I write my obligations in pencil so that I can change them as need be. In this last baseball season, we had 6 teams and a working umpire in the family for a while, so we copied off blank calendar pages and used a set only for baseball and wrote each child's commitments and then color coded it so we could see at a glance who was on call for what night. We also made blank pages for our family summer schedule and how we wanted to fit it all in and then we had our calendar for regular life. So before I made any other commitments, I had to check 3 calendars.

Plus- I exercise purt near every day. No excuses, no whining, just do it. If I take care of me, I feel better and things run smoother for all.

You could list out which chores you need to do on which days and ENJOY crossing off the day when you are done! It feels so good to cross it off and fall into bed and relax.

I find that the computer sucks me in and I waste time, so I think I am going to have to put myself on a computer diet and only check email, etc. once daily at a quiet time of day.

Another thing is learning to say No. If you are feeling like your plate is too full, it's fine to say that to people and they will probably be in awe that you are brave enough and self aware enough to say it and live it.

I also have my kids work off a chore chart so that they help with daily stuff. Part of it is a real help and part of it is a quest by me to raise good men. I am thinking of making a chore list like this for myself too, so that I do a bit each day. Not too much to be overwhelming, but something so that I get out of the habit of procrastinating and living in a messy place.

Maybe your boyfriend and you can do some chores together when he is home?? Who cares what you do as long as you are sharing each other's company.

God's blessings to you.

thank you for your reply. Yes I do make lists but I find that that overwhelms me too. Just thinking about all that...whuff! anxiety. I play on the computer most of the day at work because I don't have much to do. That and I do exercise here and watch/listen to my program. Just thinking about all those tasks and trying to prioritize what is more important than other things..that NEEDS to get done is confusing and a challenge. I think I self-sabotage myself in this area. I DO get confused about it though, maybe that is the depression?
Thank you though. I see that someone can do many things and is here also.