Stress Center Peer Support

Hi, 28 year old male here diagnosed with OCD, mostly Pure O but some compulsions as well. Recently my girlfriend and I had been leasing a house together but things were not that great (we rushed into it, managed to live together for 2 years but needed a change) Anyhow, I am now living in an apartment and she is living with a roomie and we still see each other and things are going ok. I guess the thing with me is that I am now 28 years old, living in a basement apartment and that makes me think very less of myself. I feel that my time is running out, and I need to make a move to buy a house / get married / have kids etc. Since all this happened with my girlfriend I dont think we should make that commitment quite YET. Not saying that we wont, but not right now. I guess I am just bummed about where I am in life. Although I have a nice car, nice things, a good job, etc; living in a basement apartment makes me feel less of a man of 28 years. I should have my own house, wife, etc. Anyone else ever feel this way? It always seems to be one thing or another with me, I always find something about myself to beat myself up about. Its Brutal!!

Spencer, I feel for you. Put your trust in God and know you are the only you. Very special person to God. He only made one of you. You will find out that He will help you in this life. I am on this program to help me cope with stress and worry and I know the reason is because I do not spend enough time trusting in Him. Along with that and this program I am hoping for some great things in my life. May you think good of yourself. You are special!!

I like what Lucinda says on one of the tapes
"Stop Shoulding all over yourself" yes it's a funny play on words but that is really a core prinicipal. The woulda coulda shoulda crap will suck the life right out of you. You are special just the way you are and you shouldn't compare yourself to anyone else. Who says you should have a wife and a mortgage? Maybe you were meant to own a giant Yacht and sail the world? I am being silly but you see what I am saying. There's no big hurry to join the stress filled rat race and all it's trappings. Just take a deep breath and enjoy the here and now. That's what I am learning to do and it makes my life so much more bearable. I still have hopes and dreams but i am not going to let them control me and rob me of joy. Know what I mean? Anyway take it easy and keep focusing on the blessing you mentioned and things will get better day by day.

Jill~

It's very easy to fall into a trip where we compare ourselves to others. My boyfriend is 31, lives in an his own apartment and we would like to get married in a couple of years and then we still plan on living in an apartment for another couple of years so we can save up enough for a home. My brother is 30, living in an apartment, going to university, is not even half way through his studies, not seeing anyone and probably won't get married or have kids until several years from now. So you're in good company

Do I wish I were married and had kids right now? Part of me does, but I know things just haven't worked out that way and I completely accept it.
Plus as the previous poster stated, you really have to enjoy the here and now. One day you'll have kids running around and you'll just want some time to yourself.


Are your friends and siblings already married with children?

Try and embrace your life