Stress Center Peer Support

Hi. I am new here, and hoping for some help. I am a mother of 4. My youngest child, Mason, has been diagnosed with severe anxiety disorder. We are waiting for a referral to some kind of specialist. Mason is 2 1/2. Mason's father has suffered with anxiety for 22 years. When Mason was a baby, I knew he had anxiety. Simple things scared him unreasonably. He was incredibly shy around strangers, more so than my older children. He has always been healthy, and happy when home or around any other children. Adults scare him to no end. It has gotten to the point of me asking strangers who come near him to ignore him. I ask out waiter/waitress to not look at him. If I am in a store and someone stops to speak to me, he is fine, as long as the person does not so much as look at him or speak to him. If they do he starts climbing into my arms screaming and shaking. The car wash terrifies him. He is afraid of hulk, and now anything green because of it. Green used to be his favorite color. He used to watch cartoons with dinosaurs in them. he loved the museum exhibit on dinosaurs, he had dinosaur toys. Now he is terrified of them. This week we got an official diagnoses from his pediatritian. Since his brothers went back to school this year, it has gotten much worse each day. He says everything is scarry. He is afraid of the moon. He is afraid of many things he sees on tv. Ironically, even as an infant he did not go through many of the normal fears as most kids. He was never afraid of the vacuum. Never afraid of any animal, etc. Now my precious little boy is afraid of mosquitos and house flies, Hulk, the car wash, the moon. It is breaking my heart. He is so smart and sweet. He is afraid of people he used to love, like his godmother, pediatritian, neighbors.
Yesterday, I took my son and his Grandfather to see a litter of puppies a friend has. His Grandfathers dog recently passed away, and his Grandfather is lost without his pet. In addition, my son says he cant go to his Grandfathers house because the dog is gone. At that point, his Grandfather said, find me a dog! When we got to the breeders house, my son hid behind the truck, afraid to go near my friend/breeder. I told him that he promised his Grandfather he would help him pick out a puppy, and needed to go see them. He peeked around the side of the truck and looked at the pups playing. He looked at the friend/breeder. He looked back at the pups. My sweet little boy took a deep breath, grabbed my hand, said...its scarry mommy....and walked into the fence to see these puppies. In 2 minutes time he was sitting in the grass with one tiny little pup, right beside my friend/breeder, saying....mommy,the puppy wont let me be scared! I breed dogs as well, but I breed Giant breed dogs. My son loves to hold them for the first 2 weeks, and then they are too big for him to handle. Several people I know who have anxiety have told me to get him a small pup. The friend/breeder has called me and told me to come pick this puppy up for my son, as she suffers from anxiety as well, and knows how hard it can be, and she hopes it will help my son. (plus, I saved her dog's life after being snake bit this past weekend) I am wondering if it is a good idea to try this. I know my son is good with dogs. He handles pups within an hour of birth regularly. While I am delivering puppies with the mom, he holds the others to keep him occupied, and keeping them warm till the mom can do her job. Will a small pup of his own to take with him when he goes around running errands with me help him? A little bit of comfort and security from home when we are out? I am self employed, keeping my son with me while I work. We rarely have to get out of the car while I am meeting clients, often on their lunch breaks etc at their jobs. I have barely worked in 3 weeks because my clients scare my son. I have to work. I have to have my son healthy and well adjusted. Someone please help us. I need advice. i need a miracle. I want my son to be well adjusted. I want this to be better for him instead of watching his anxiety worsen. I think his anxiety is giving me anxiety. I wish I could have anxiety for him instead of with him. Please, help me help my little boy.

I don't know if panic and anxiety is genetic, but it sounds like he's afraid to be around people ! Does he notice the way his dad acts when his dad panics ? Did your son watch TV and something scarry caught his attention ? Maybe he's having nightmares. When does he go in to see the specialist ? It could be a number of reasons why he's like that. I was like that as a kid. The first real bad attack hit when I was in grade 5. During the first one I had, I blacked out (I was in the classroom). That's why it's a good idea for your son to be checked out now while he's young. Keep in touch and let us know how things are coming along !

Masons Mom,
Welcome! I just read your post. I hope you have the program? It will help you!
I am not a mom, so it maybe not right to tell someone who is, but I am a animal lover and raised all kinds of things! ( all 4 legged )My thoughts are, good for taking your son to the doctor and get medical help for sure.
Another thought crossed my mind and it may not apply to you, but it could.
As a kid I too had anxiety, but no one called it that, but my mom would always not knowing make somethings worse! If I would say " I'm scared of monsters in the closet, she would say "you better stay in bed then!"
It was my grandma who would climb in bed with me and say what kind of monster? Well do this if it would come to scare you. She could calm my fears and give me reassurance that I was alright. That always worked for me.
Maybe he has your number, as if he is really afraid he gets special attention. Is he #4?

You may pick up on his anxiety and rather than be strong for him, you may worry and it feeds the cycle. I would do this program for your self as you may see some things in it that would help you get a better understanding of not only yourself but maybe some insight to the kids as well. It is good to invest in yourself, it will pay you in so many ways.
I liked the idea of his own dog. Maybe a small dog with calm assertive energy. Let the puppy pick him. (maybe not even a pup?) Kids and dogs can be a great match. You know best as you will have to care for another animal. Kids can help, but you know how that goes!
I hope this helps in some way, good luck to you.

Hi, and thanks for your replies. Mason is #4....which means he is spoiled rotten and doted on by everyone, his older brothers included. My children are very close. He has been scared of Hulk since he walked in the room and saw him on tv in the middle of crushing walls. Thankfully, the fear of hulk has passed! We did get a puppy. He has a 6 week old Chihuahua pup, while not my favorite breed by any means, she is perfect for him. She is already housebroken (gotta love that breeder!) so there is no stress about trying to potty train her. Mason doesn't pick her up and carry her around, because he doesn't have to, which is great cause she weighs 1.8 lbs. She follows him every step he takes. She sleeps with him. Which also means she sleeps with me, cause he wont sleep away from me. He doesnt seem to have any nightmares. He actually laughs and smiles in his sleep. I still have no idea when he will see the specialist, waiting to find out. Since we got the puppy, he has had two occasions when he started to get real nervous. His dad took him to the parts store yesterday, and he started crying, not wanting to go in. His dad told him that Cookie could come too, and he could show her to everyone. Mason said okay, was still nervous, but he went! In ten minutes, his dad was letting him call me to tell me that the guys love his Cookie. He also took a gumball from one of them, which is a first for him. Last night, I took him into a store, with Cookie in my purse. (I know, no dogs in Dolar General....but I figure she wasnt in Dollar General, she was in my purse ) A woman tried to talk to him, he got nervous, and I said Mason, Cookie! He stuck his hand in my purse and started petting her, and ignored the woman. On the way home, he saw the moon, and started saying moon scarry, over and over...I said, Mason, what does Cookie think of the moon? He talked to het for a minute, then said Mommy, Cookie says moon pretty. I talked to Mason for hours about how a puppy wouldnt let him be scared anymore. He holds her tail and pets it for long periods of time, playing with her tail like he does my hair. His father makes a point to get away from Mason when in an anxiety attack. He doesnt want Mason to see him. Right now, Mason is laying on the floor watching cartoons. Cookie is laying on the floor with him on a blanket, letting Mason hold her tail. Hopefully we will get the referral tomorrow. For the moment, Cookie is an answer to my prayers!