Stress Center Peer Support

I know that my hubby needs to be encouraged to go through the program but when I try to he thinks I'm nagging. How can I help him? He admits he needs it but just can't be motivated to do it. My mom won't even admit she needs the program and doesn't even consider doing it. It's so hard for me to watch them struggle! HELP!

Neyssa

This must be very frustrating for you as you're wishing the best for both of them. There could be a few things going on with the situation with your husband. I'm not exactly sure how you are trying to encourage him like what words you are using them and how. I do know that people don't like being controlled and they may reject things if they are being pushed into their face which i'm not really getting that feeling in your situation. The other thing is it may be an excuse to not get better.

One thing that is really great is that he admits that he needs it. This is great! He accepts his condition and accepts that he needs the help. Also being in this state myself I understand in great depth the feeling of being unmotivated. It is very difficult when there is so much negativity sucking away all our energy from the guilt & frustration of not being able to do things, the anger, the negative defeating thoughts, pain from the past. There is so much that it seems like there isn't any energy left to do other things. The best advice i can give you is to come from a place of understanding at first. Let him know that you realize that he is in a challenging situation and it is normal to be in it with all the things that have lead him up to that point (if you know the troubles he has endured). Empathize with him and offer to help him out with the program.

Another thing is when we get into the program ourselves it does become contageous and to the point where people actually start approach us about how to overcome anxiety and depression. Or they may just pick up our habits a little bit along the way. The energy you put out cannot be completely ignored and when you change then some of the relationships would have to change as well in order to be maintained.


Mike