Stress Center Peer Support

Some verbal abuse tips I have found. At the moment of being verbally abused, remember to:
Stay calm. Do not become agitated.
Let the abuser vent. He or she will lose steam and may realize the person refuses to become a victim of their abuse.
Do not reward the abuser by reacting to their actions with hurtful responses. Lashing out lets the abuser know they had power in affecting the person’s emotions.

Glass

another is -- get out of the abusive situation if it seems warranted. for example, some people don't like that their verbal abuse is being "taken lightly" or "ignored" -- and they get more violent.

(physical cues like hovering/blocking doorways suggest that one should get out asap.)

don't reply if your going to be an purposeful fool. It's just really not that funny, it's kinda dumb and imature. anyway good luck to ya. I'm yelling.

Hi, If a person is really abusive, then yet you need to get out or get help.
Most of us have people in our lives that don't know they are being verbally abusive. That does not make the pain any less. I have used the tactic of Malikye many times in my life, but it gets you nowhere and just shows how insecure we really are.
The better advice is from glass, but does anyone know how to stop the feelings of anger and hurt?
When ever I am called stupid or you don't know how to shop, or damn you can't do anything ritht, I know the person is just saying something in frustration and does not know how to use words, but at the time I get so mad that I could just hit that person. I am learning to curb my temper, but how do you stop the flip flop of your heart or your stomach? Even at work we will get generalized emails from customers that are acutally directed at the comany, but if I am the one that opens it, I get insulted.
I was verbally abused by my parents for most of my growing up years, but I now know they did not know what they were saying. They had 6 kids and 8 mouths to feed (including them), and were pretty overwhelmed. They did not come from the greatest upbringing but they tried their best. They were wonderful parents, but when they got angry they did not know that the words they used would hurt us. I being a very sensitive person took it to heart and the others could let it slide off their shoulders.
Anyway, don't be too hard on Malikye, he knows not what he speaks.
Thanks,
HOPEFULL

Glass, thank you I needed to hear that. I have a verbally abusive exhusband and lately I've been playing right into his hands giving him all the power. Serenity now!

Anyway, don't be too hard on Malikye, he knows not what he speaks.

He sure doesn't.

Originally posted by Barb G.:
Malikye, You should be banned!!

I think he should be banned as well, Barb.

KARILYN, I NOW HAVE BEEN VERBALLY ABUSED THEEE TIMES ON THIS THREAD. YOU SEEM TO SHOW UP ON EVERY THREAD THAT MIGHT TURN INTO AN ARGUMENT.I WILL SPLAIN YOU. NEVER TREAT VERBAL ABUSE WITH SILENCE.THAT IS GIVING THEM POWER. YOU GIVE IT RIGHT BACK AT THEM. WE DON'T LIVE IN THAT WORLD. OUR SPIRIT DIES IF WE DON'T STAND FOR IT.....................................MALIKYE

What the heck are you talking about.

WHY SHOULD I BE BANNED? FOUR TIMES NOW.