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Posted: Tue Feb 02, 2010 10:22 am
by BrianP
Posted February 01, 2010 02:52 AM
I just started session 4 a couple of days ago. i know that Luncinda Bassett, suggested to let go of expectations, and quite litteraly try to be in control of your own life. But lately since i started volunteering I've been getting paranoid about people talking about me behind my back. I feel that when it happens i think there is something wrong with me. Like i just dont belong. I am currently trying to come to the conculsion i cant live like this anymore. I just feel the mental wall i have kept up all these years is getting harder and harder to tear down. I know that i dont have control of what people think of me. I should just try and control what i can in my own life and be at peace with who i am. The problem is trying to overcome my own anxiety that i am currently facing is the delema. I am also trying to fight my old habits of people pleaseing and trying hard to fit in. I know i should not be anxious because i have no control over how people think of me. But taking the action is so much work. I sometimes want to just give up and go back to where i was, Because the fear the parnoia and the constent effet to try and have positive dialog with myself and not let these emotions control me is taking a toll on me.

Posted: Tue Feb 02, 2010 11:21 am
by Guest
Hey Brian,

I know exactly what you mean. But I encourage you to just do the best you can. This program produces more anxiety before it decreases it because you are turning around and facing it rather than ignoring it or running away. But I was on the same path as you not that long ago, and I just took a step back and said to myself " This is something new to me, I am allowed to struggle and find it challenging. But I am doing my best and I am very happy about that." You are doing something most people don't have the courage to do their entire life time, face and conquer their fears.

It does get easier, just hang in there. BUT, if you feel overwhelmed, take a break. This is not a race and you go at your own pace. If I can do it and hundreds of thousands of others, so can you. Patience is a very difficult thing for people like us, take it day by day.

Take care of yourself

Eddy J