Stress Center Peer Support

So this is one of those, "does anyone else?" questions/comments. Sometimes I tend to get very anxious at dusk as it gets dark... I'm not afraid of the dark or anything, it just happens... sometimes sending me into a panic attack. It's the worst if I take a nap after work, and wake up & it's dark... I wake up terrified (again, not afraid of the dark).

Could it be something as simple as my thoughts about night? I know sometimes as it gets late I start to think "Oh no, the day is almost over, I've barely done anything productive, spent most of it depressed, and am going to have to do it all over again tomorrow (I have terrible anxiety/depression in the am too)." But this doesn't seem to be enough to bring on full blown terror... my therapist says I'm having night terrors (really bad nightmares).. but I know the difference.

So, anyone else experience this? Thoughts?

Phantom,
I've never experienced the night anxiety your're referring to but I have experienced the morning anxiety. What i've done that seems to help is that I made a list of all the things that I am grateful for and put it next to my bed (right by the alarm clock). The first thing I do in the morning is read the list and add anything to it I can think of. I now have almost a full page. It helps me start off on a positive note. Hope this helps.

Oh boy do I ever know this one! OK, I had the exact same thing happen to me and didn't know what was going on. I pretty much thought it was just because with anxiety we like knowing all aspects of everything and all possible out comes (control) and for me I think it was because with it being night, I wasn't able to see outside as well or what's going on in the world around my house. I would often spend several hours outside in the sunshine or if in my house have all my doors and windows open (I had a thing with confided, closed spaces and needing some form of fresh air) and then once I saw the sun going down I would freak out. Panic and say to myself, ok... their are neighbors home across the street, houses all around me, friends and family everywhere and i'm not alone. In some way I had it in my head that as night fell, my home fell into some dark abyss until sunrise. Then I had to tell myself, it is the end of the day, I should be enjoying the night sky and the stars and if I didn't finish anything that I needed to today, I can get around to it tomorrow. Then came my nightly pep talk and routine... It wasn't from a total fear of the dark, but I often found myself seeking flashlights and candles in case by some chance the power went out. It was crazy. I did find that by me physically being outside and making myself stay there to watch a sunset or just be present until the sun was full set and it was now dark helped. It kinda snapped me into a present reality of the world around me and not get caught up in my chaotic thinking.

I think anxiety can be triggered by feeling cut off from the world outside our own head. Really the world is a pretty friendly place -- it's the negative, demanding, critical voices in our head that are so frightening and unforgiving and relentless.

I would guess that when the sun goes down, and it's dark out, you feel trapped in your own inner world. In that world, being productive seems to be the measure of self-worth. I have that mistaken idea too.

It's important to talk back to that voice, to reframe your thoughts. Maybe list the productive things you did -- even if seemingly small -- and tell yourself, what I did today is enough. I don't have to be perfect. Or other sentences that are soothing and plausible to you.

It might also help to stay active in something -- even if it's just TV, or putting clothes away -- because when we just sit and brood, or lie in bed, our minds can race around and rev up the negative thoughts: lazy, didn't accomplish anything, blah blah.

Be as kind to yourself as you would to a little girl you love. Be forgiving of yourself. Say nice things. And accept yourself just as you are: that's really what self-love is about.

best of luck. Keep listening to the CDs -- they really work.

-- Missouri Gal

I also have AM anxiety. That sounds like a great idea!