Stress Center Peer Support

Hey everyone.

I could really use a "you can do it," or "that's normal" or "it will be ok."


I have been dating someone for a few weeks. We had an all day together date on Sunday that went fabulously. However...I don't know if I'm thinking myself into a state or if it's allergies...or a little of both.

I have been having horrible allergies and a ton of drainage. I have also taken the dating thing well, even though this is my biggest fear (change, relationships).

Well I know that I thought about my dating this guy a lot yesterday. I talked about it a lot with friends. I was excited...then I was anxious. My head has been kind of spinning ever since.

well this morning out of nowhere, I kind of gagged and then threw up a few times. I have had a lot of drainage and am curious if this is normal with sinus drainage.

I am scared that I have thought too much about this guy and what the future will be like. I am afraid I am loosing my grip on how well I've handled it. I'm afraid I've gotten myself into a bsd state that is not going to go away.

I could use some courage and reassurance. Please help me find it. My therapist has been on vacation for three weeks and during that time I've faced my biggest fear. And now I feel like it is taking over and I am going to just fall apart.

I feel like dating has wall after wall to walk through, but I don't want to be throwing up over it. I would much rather believe that it was just allergies.

If anybody could show me some reassurance, advise me on questions to ask myself for journaling, Tips on thought stopping, because I'm having trouble. If any of this is possible... I would be eternally grateful.

Hi Lilsismj:
It is normal to be sort of highstrung when beginning to date. It may be a llittle harder on you since this is one of your fears.
But I believe that you can handle it.
You really have been doing well. And the rewards will probably outweigh the discomfort you are having to get thru'.
I would suggest some realaxing imagery when you begin to start to feel highly stressed. Like that walk thru' the woods to the waterfall on the relaxation CD. Just as your mind can take you down negative paths of fear, it can also create a state of calm for you. You can create any scene you want. You can even image successful dates like you had on Sunday.
Don't give up on yourself.
I wish you every happiness on this new venture.
It will be okay .
MaryJane

You are doing really well! I totally get the sinus drainage thing and it sounds like you need to be on a decongestant, maybe even prescription strength if you can get it. If you are afraid of meds or doctors then I would suggest a lot of tea (mint especially, which may help other stuff too) and visiting a health store for natural remedies. Good job going on the date and just try to remember how fun that was when you feel anxious about the next one.

Yeah, and throwing up is a bit of a trigger for me. I would like to believe I just had a ton of phlemn in my tummy, but I'm having a hard time believing it or myself.

I have a doctors appointment about my allergies tomorrow. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I don't want to sabotage myself. I've always been afraid of throwing up and when that happened this morning -- it threw me so far!

There is so much I don't know...about life...about dating. And, i wish I could stop the mhat if's

Thanks for the support.

Well I empathize with your sinus issues. The pollen count this week in Ohio was well up into the 1000 point range. I typically spend the first hour of my day with a scratchy voice and sore throat. I love spring but hate the allergies.