Stress Center Peer Support

I'm wondering if anyone else experiences this. I am a softare analyst, so at times I have to get super focused on what I'm doing and run through a scenario start to finish without getting distracted so I don't miss anything. I work for a company that designs software for a major airline. Today I'm filling up a flight, taking people off, changing to another aircraft type (in test mode of course) and making sure nobody gets "lost" or moved to the wrong spot on the plane.

At times I zone in so much I almost feel like I'm in my own little world. I noticed the clock and got up to get lunch, and it was like I was waking up from a dream or something. This happened yesterday as well.

It's been a long time since this has happened and I'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing, quite frankly.

I have been making HUGE improvements in my life and experiencing a lot more calm and happiness.

I have had trouble concentrating the last several months as I had so much negative going on.

Yesterday I was feeling almost a euphoric feeling while working. I was in my zone, listening to music on my headphones. . .nobody was bothering me. It was time to go so I did, but I almost didn't want to stop working. I wanted to stay in my "zone."

Then, I had some anxiety about it last night wondering if there was something "wrong" with me. LOL

I was back to an old habit of looking up "disorders" and wondering if I had some sort of computer addiction.

I have had times in the past where my hubby has expressed that I spend too much time on the computer chatting, surfing, etc. I even do some of the surfing while I'm supposed to be working, which makes me feel guilty.

Anyway, I have improved in that area, slipped a bit into it this weekend while selling some extra stuff for my daughter (and snapping at my son for interrupting).

So, when I had that experience yesterday it sort of scared me.

Has anyone else had this experience? I am wondering if there are any other programmers or testers on this forum.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm ADD or something (or just weird) . . . and then I try to tell myself to just cut it out. . . I'm doing pretty well. My husband has ADD and I'm pretty different from him. But, I do generally get distracted easily like a little kid.

You're fine, Chris. T'aint nothing wrong with you. It's that "scare voice" at it again, trying to make something out of nothing. Remind yourself of this everytime it tries to get you to worry. "Oh, it's just that ego thinking mind that loves to get me all riled up. Forget it. Not this time. I'm not following you."

Remember to do your best to keep yourself out of your thinking mind. You were just in it too much and it got you a little scared. Actually, the fact that you can zone out probably made that scare voice feel threatened so it had to come up with something to take you out of the present moment. That's exactly how it works.

yeah I think that is the key; keeping out of the thinking mind.

The problem with my job is that it requires that at times. Generally I consider that a huge bonus because I like to just sit and think, and it keeps me from doing the "spinning" on stuff that doesn't matter. But, this time it caught me off guard.

At any rate, I'm making huge strides, this was just a minor bump. . . and today is a new day.

It was weird letting myself "go there" again though. I didn't like that one bit!! I was thinking about how horrible I felt 6 months ago and suddenly was thinking. . .wow what would it be like to have to go all through that again?!

Thing is, I know I'm not ever going to let myself go "there" again. I have too many good tools to pull myself out now.

But, an unfortunate visit will probably still happen from time to time.

Thanks Boon.

P.S. I'm also noticing that if I stay super busy doing fun things, that voice tries to come in and tell me that I need to slow down and "process" everything I've done. Of course that's not true, but it's something I've always done. I'll go do something with friends, then have to have a break on my own to think through everything that was said and done.

I'm finally realizing that I don't need to do that. Not that you want to be so busy you don't have any rest, but what does mulling over every little detail of life do for us? NADA.

You are absolutely right! Wanting to mull over our daily events or even a conversation with someone is that "ego thinking mind" trying to keep itself alive. All it needs is one of our reactions to make it happy. You already see this and are in the process of catching it. I still have to catch myself from time to time but I have more peaceful moments in between now and I just say, "Not today."

Also, the scare voice (or ego thinking mind) will test us from time to time. Always welcome these tests. You can never go back to the way you were. Never. You know too much to ever do that. New habits have been formed by your hard work and they can't be changed. So when you go through this from time to time, just say: "Whatever", and move on with your day.

Great job.

Yes, thanks!

By the way, I had been trying to find a phrase to say to the "boo voice" or an image of him to laugh at, etc.

When you said 'WHATEVER' the first time we talked, it really clicked. That is what I say to myself when I feel my mind trying to start spinning into the what if stuff.

I say "whatever" and imagine the little boo monster shrinking smaller and smaller.