Stress Center Peer Support

I feel like there is no hope for me anymore. I have tried the program and tried the program and I am sure that I could try harder at it, but I just feel like its hopeless. I feel like I am never gonna get over these anxiety problems of mine and that my life will never be normal again.

I know that is a bad negative thought. I realize that I should turn it into a positive one, but what happens tomorrow and the next day when eventually the negative will overcome again.

I guess what I am trying to say is that I feel like I am fighting a endless battle. I see people around me enjoying there life and doing things that are fun and interesting and just living. And I know deep inside that will never be me. I know I have very low self esteem and my advice is one, how do you get a better self esteem?...two, what positive things do others do on a day to day basis that helps to make there life a little more brighter?..three, is there one thing that I could focus on now to help and improve things? What happens when a person just doesnt want to try anymore?

Life is a struggle and its pulling me down...
Any advice would help. thx.

The thing that I have found most useful for me thus far is to not let the feelings I am feeling prevent me from doing the program or other life events. This is extremely difficult as I have became agoraphobic about a month ago and had to force myself to move forward. I guess what I am trying to say is sometimes doing the action prior to having the feelings brings the feelings on that we are so desperately wanting. It is so hard!!! I know, but, I refuse to give up....and at the moments I feel like giving up I redo a tape, listen to the relaxation tape, read something inspirational, let myself cry for a little bit and then do something to distract me. Non of this is easy...in fact probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do. But, there is hope...people are getting better and I want to be one of those people. Hold on,,,and keep the positive moments positive...and ride through the other moments. I hear with you, you are not alone.

You are not alone in the way that you feel. I struggle with the same thuoghts and questions every single day. I'm sure there are many others.

The best way I've found to cope is by engaging in activities that I still enjoy, few that they are. Find an old challange that has stumped you in the past and overcoming it can make you feel much better about yourself. Go out of your way to help those you love.

Hang in there, you are not alone.

BlueSkies4me,

You have no other choice but to fight for your life! It's not hopeless! I am proof of that!

Want to know how to help your self-esteem? It's through positive self-talk... talk that is encouraging and truthful. This is one of the MAJOR keys to getting better. If you haven't given this your best effort, I just want to encourage to give this part your ALL!

I made a tape of myself talking and saying positive things about myself and during the day I played it back over and over again. I know for many that may sound silly but it really helps get your mind in the right place.

It's definately hard to stay focused on recovery but you get there by taking baby steps and by one day at a time!

When you watch other people "enjoy" their lives, you do not see their thoughts or struggles. Do not make the mistake of thinking that everyone has it better than you because someone else could be suffering worse than you and just not show it.

Hang in there....journal your thoughts and then tell yourself the truth!

It is by persistance that you will recover!!!!!!!!

I too am agoraphobic, formyboys...it is very debilatating. And I want to applaud you for you efforts to progress and not let this drag you down. that is excellent. Just curious if excercise would help me at least get over this depression slump so I can at least start overcoming some negative thoughts. Has anyone seen significant positives with excercise and how much if so??

Thanks for making me feel not so alone. I know my thinking always resorts back to the poor me attitude, even though I know other people are suffering with things much more horrible then my own.

It's just hard to always keep it together I guess. There are so many things that I am worried about. It's like a constant circle, like Lucinda says, you have to be able to jump out of it. I guess I just havent figured out how yet. Why does everything seem so scary all the time? Just simple things. I just want a little peace as well as all of you I am sure.

Of course I know it's my attitude. But I dont really know where to start to help improve myself. There are so many things wrong....lol. I will give the tape idea a try....thanks for that sunset ;....and everyone thanks for the encouragement.

Thanks for all the encouragment.

i know how you feel... except with me i dont want to let go my depression because its not that i feel lonely but the fact that i am surrounded by it and it seems like everyone these days has problems and if i recover then i will be lonely, becuz im 17 and i just want to fit in.. im sorry, im rambling and venting

blue skies,

(Love the name )

i can preach to you until next month about the benefits of exercise in overcoming depression AND anxiety!

i have always been active, and always loved the feelings of well-being and calm in my life when i am in my routine of lifting weights regularly and running.

but let me tell you, i never thought that it would help me on the path of recovery from anxiety.

first off, YOU ARE WORTH IT!

i don't know if you are religious or not, but you are alive and you were created for a reason. Think about it...what are the chances that everything just all of a sudden came out of nowhere and instantly began to evolve into all these different forms of life, and humanity of course evolved intellectually higher than everything else (the reason why big bang theorists can never truly advise), and that is the way that it is.

hrmph. kinda depressing to think that way, isn't it?

but if you believe that you were created for a reason, by a loving G-o-d, then hope and light will begin to enter your days.

but, enough of that for right now .

you are asking about exercise. this is something that i happen to know a bit about as i am finishing up my grad degree in phys ed, have bodybuilded(?-urk) for the past 15 years, and believe this stuff!

heck- don't take my word for it...go online...look at the benefits of exercise. look at how people who exercise regularly, are less likely to not only suffer from disease, but also less likely to develop ANXIETY and DEPRESSION. And to heal from anxiety and depression, like i am doing, the benefits are tremendous. Google seach exercise and anxiety and depression to start.

exercise is SO successful that...(keep this between you and me)...in clinical studies it has proven just AS effective OR MORE EFFECTIVE than prescription medication AND counseling.

put that in your pipe and smoke it, Big Pharmaceutical!!

but like all things...it is hard to start (something about "the greatest journey begins with a simple step" comes to mind ), and old habits die hard (much like the reasons why we suffer from anxiety in the 1st place, bad/ negative habits/ thinking).

you know what though, if you are worth it (which you are), and you were created for a reason (which you were- don't worry about why just yet, as life is a journey, not a destination- oh, i love these cliches), don't you atleast owe yourself some time with something positive?

you have probably heard this many times over, but little chemical doohickies called Endorphins are released into the blood, triggering the "positive high" one experiences when running, for instance. And believe me, they work!

It takes time, but not only do they help you feel better about life, your outlook and attitude, but they also help take the edge off of anxiety.

The best part is, you get what you give.

if you are new and agoraphobic, you don't even have to leave the cozy confines of your home.

Are there stairs in your house? You could walk stairs for 10 minutes/day 3 times/ week to start for 2-3 weeks. push-ups, sit-ups, can work wonders. are there any friends or family members who can help you? your local library may have some good exercise tapes/ dvd's that you can borrow to play in your home.

best of all, you do it on your schedule, and when you are ready. studies typically show consistent results from regular exercise within 4-6 weeks.

so look at it this way blue skies...if what you have been doing thus far makes you feel down and out, why not try something else?

don't worry and get bogged down with what type of exercise routine to follow right now, because there is alot (too much) stuff out there. Alot is good, but so much is not worth a roll of toilet paper, if you know what i mean

And perhaps the one thing that i told myself when i was at my lowest point this past march and april is:

ONE DAY AT A TIME

Read Randy Pauschs book: The Last Lecture. See him on YOUTube. YOUTube Tony Robbins to get you started with exercise.

You see blueskies, there is no "bear" or "dragon" that is waiting for you, and is going to get you (I am referring to the panic response). You create the fear. You can turn it off.

Stop feeding it and start feeding YOU.

if you have not exercised regularly in awhile (or ever), get with a friend and make a doctor appointment for complete physical. make sure that you are able to exercise (you most likely are). then, just start. get your heartrate elevated. sweat. smile and breath. with each repetition, anxiety and depression dies, and you get stronger.

my new counselor has a great adage. She told me, that when it comes to anxiety she "likes Nike".

I pondered on that for some time, but still puzzled for an answer replied: "huh?"

she told me "...just do it."

I absolutely loved your reply paul!! And you included lotsa info, thanks for taking the time to express all those ideas. I will have to start excercising now. You are definetly right the journey begins with one step. You have inspired me to start now. thanks for that.

Exercise has been key in my steps to getting better too. I try to walk every morning for 45 minutes. I can definately tell a difference when I miss on day.....The tightness in my throat starts to go away a couple minutes into my walk....Its worth the effort...sometimes I have to drag myself to do it but, I know that I will feel much better once I do...Hope today is brighter for you.

you know what blue skies?

thank you for listening.

thank you for not giving up.

and I hope that you find everything that need to keep on keeping on.

you ARE worth it.