Stress Center Peer Support

Well, I was doing so good for quite a while and then yesterday...BAM! I had a complete and total meltdown that I thought I needed to go the ER as I was having very scary symptoms (chest pain, shortness of breath, dizziness...fyi I am only 32) and I was sure that I was going to be committed. I was sure that I wouldn't be able to go to work anymore and that I probably would lose my job. I was crying hysterically and couldn't break the cycle. My poor fiance (we are getting married in October) tries so hard but even he was horribly frustrated with me. I have been under alot of stress at work (I work in longterm care facilities) not to mention I am getting married and a whole boatload of family issues. Has anyone had these meltdowns and what is the best way to handle these? I am not on any meds and don't want to be if I can help it. Please help...I am trying so hard to get better by the time of my wedding!!

Meltdowns are not fun, and yet I feel as if sometimes they can be somewhat cathartic. This is my take on meltdowns; they come about because we keep denying our feelings and engaging in negative self talk which causes a lot of stress. And the more stress we feel we just keep pushing ourselves until we reach the limit and poof meltdown. It's like a pressure cooker or a volcano. Everything is all bottled up inside and our feelings are building and we need some sort of release to decrease the pressure.

For me I think the way to avoid meltdowns is to truly listen to the messages that I am sending myself. Am I putting myself down? Am I expecting too much of myself or others? Are my expectations unrealistic?

It also helps to eat good, get plenty of rest and exercise, which helps relieve stress. People with anxiety tend to be a little intense so I've found that these things have helped me to calm down. Hope this helps.

Great advice, aleisa. I also think using the Relaxation audio several times helps as well.

As far as the negative thoughts, if I don't actually write them down, then rewrite them, I don't see a change. You must make them positive - in writing!

You do have a lot of stress and getting married is a huge life decision. It's ok to be a bit anxious - allow yourself that, but know it will pass.

Do you journal weekly, if not daily? Perhaps journaling about the issues at work, family issues, and upcoming nuptials will help to get perspective on them - or at least allow yourself to feel the emotions, then move on.

Best wishes to you!

Don't forget - you are not in control of everything - nor do you have to be.

Really great advice aleisa!

It is really hard when things are going well and then all of a sudden you're hit with a meltdown, or panic attack etc. It always feels like for every step fwd I take, there's always two steps back. It is hard and dissapointing, but I just have to remind myself that this is normal and part of the healing process. Meltdowns and PA's won't go away over night. Just try to keep reminding yourself that you are making progress and keep using your wedding as motivation - use anything that keeps you focused on the good and positive in your life. Its so important to live in the moment and use compassionate self talk when things like this happen