Highly Sensitive People (HSP)

Charlie Brown · Post by **Charlie Brown** » Thu Jan 13, 2011 2:31 am

This article received in my Inbox from WebMD is absolutely incredible for highly sensitive people! I felt like I was reading a biography of myself. 98-99% of the descriptions of an HSP is me to a T.

I always knew I was sensitive. This confirms it. Often, it bothered my I was so sensitive. After reading this, I longer feel that way. In fact, I am kind of proud.

http://www.webmd.com/balance/f...e?ecd=wnl_emw_011211

Paisleegreen · Post by **Paisleegreen** » Thu Jan 13, 2011 7:25 am

Wow, thanks Charlie Brown! Great article! It describes me quite well. I'm more the extrovert though, DH is the introvert. I definitely have sensitivity to light and have a great imagination. I have a hard time sleeping other than my own bed, and never, ever would fall asleep at a movie theater or where people could see me.

I surprised myself that at one time I could take a nap in a quiet college campus lounge, on a couch in front of a massive fireplace. There was relatively minimal student activity and is meant to be a restful contemplative place.

I was always a good little babysitter, even at the age of 8 years old. I babysat my nieces when they were newborns. I loved to sit and hold newborns. I also was good at hearing them cry when I was in a different part of the house. Even with my own children, they didn't need to cry, I could hear them stir when it was feeding time and I was right there, thus, I didn't have screaming babies to get my attention. Which scientists have pointed out that babies cry more when they don't feel their needs are being met.

I had sensitive friends, which did react with hostility when they felt I wasn't being sensitive. I am no longer close to a dear friend because I reacted to her sensitivity to protect my sensitivity. We are now at least back to sending birthday cards and I sent a Christmas card, but didn't get one from her.

I really did something that caused our friendship to end due to bad advice from a life coach that I only knew via the phone. Since then a Psychologist would have suggested a different way of asserting myself to, what I thought a negative email.

I was so sensitive that when she called after the email, I couldn't talk to her. So any contact I have with her goes to a P.O.Box which she always had to protect her privacy. Anyway, a very long story.

I think any insensitivity I have, I learned from my parents, particularly my mother, who was highly sensitive and reactive, that us kids had to learn to protect ourselves by being aloof or avoidance. I wish I had learned these things sooner...but maybe by the past experiences in relationships...I was learning. Hmmm....

Paislee

Molly77 · Post by **Molly77** » Fri Jan 14, 2011 5:16 am

I have book about HSP's. It is very interesting and helps me to relax that I am not broken. I am more of an extroverted HSP and a risk taker. I do NOT agree that it is a disorder. It is a gift! We just need to learn to deal with our traits in the outside world...like learning to ask what someone meant by their statement. I am learning that many people communicate differently than the other. Many people misunderstood and still do, me because I state things differently than most people. I have upset people because they take my words without knowing my intent behind them. This has been very helpful for me to not get so hurt by others seemingly unkind words. I now look at the person who is saying it and take it in the context that that person may mean it, and not how I would mean it if I said those words. If I am unclear about something I now ask. It has proven VERY effective.

Animals have always been close to me and I to them, because of this ability to see the hidden.
To read the energy and intent...not my fears of what those signals would mean if it was the worst case scenario.

I feel glad that you posted this Charlie Brown!! Thank you!!

Paisleegreen · Post by **Paisleegreen** » Fri Jan 14, 2011 8:00 am

I'm like you, Molly, I now question people on what they mean, more my husband as he comes from a sarcastic family. Also, animals love me too.

I'm really good with little children and reading them as well. I especially get upset when I hear them in stores and the parents aren't patient or realizing that they are tired and need to go home. Or have a time out in the car, not yelled at. Frustrating...

Charlie Brown · Post by **Charlie Brown** » Fri Jan 14, 2011 9:38 am

Paisleegreen and Molly77, I am glad you like the posting.

I like Molly's term "extroverted HSP." That's how I would pretty much classify myself now.

When I was younger, I was an easy target for bullies, and was picked on alot. After Columbine and other similar incidents, I thank God I never ended up like those students. In my 20s I became more street-wise and later self-confident. While I have 98-99% of the HSP traits, I have no problem being an extrovert, and defending myself verbally and physically. I would have no quams about telling someone off, and not think twice about it. In fact, I have had worked on reignig in being sarcastic and a big mouth.

I also love animals.

Juno · Post by **Juno** » Fri Jan 14, 2011 1:46 pm

That's a very interesting article. Not sure if I'm convinced though. I would have to read more about it. I defeinitely think I am HSP, but it doesn't seem to explain all of my behavior though. Does that mean our brains work differently?
My epiphany came when I learned about Myers-Briggs personality type. Being ENFJ and reading the descriptions of that really blew my mind. It was like seeing myself in a mirror. And figuring out everyone else's type easily showed me who I should avoid. That's how I met my boyfriend of 3 years, who I live with. Perfect match. We did not meet through a dating web site though. I figured out his type through dating him, but the personality theory just guided me so I knew what to look for. That is also how Match.com and other personality based web sites work. So how does HSP affect personality? Interesting...

Charlie Brown · Post by **Charlie Brown** » Mon Jan 17, 2011 1:44 am

Originally posted by Juno:
That's a very interesting article. Not sure if I'm convinced though. I would have to read more about it. I defeinitely think I am HSP, but it doesn't seem to explain all of my behavior though. Does that mean our brains work differently?
My epiphany came when I learned about Myers-Briggs personality type. Being ENFJ and reading the descriptions of that really blew my mind. It was like seeing myself in a mirror. And figuring out everyone else's type easily showed me who I should avoid. That's how I met my boyfriend of 3 years, who I live with. Perfect match. We did not meet through a dating web site though. I figured out his type through dating him, but the personality theory just guided me so I knew what to look for. That is also how Match.com and other personality based web sites work. So how does HSP affect personality? Interesting...

Congrats on the epiphany!

This is the first I heard of such a description of being sensitive. I will guess that HSP doesn't affect personality, but is a part of your personality.

Paisleegreen · Post by **Paisleegreen** » Mon Jan 17, 2011 6:49 am

When I was younger, I was an easy target for bullies, and was picked on alot. After Columbine and other similar incidents, I thank God I never ended up like those students. In my 20s I became more street-wise and later self-confident. While I have 98-99% of the HSP traits, I have no problem being an extrovert, and defending myself verbally and physically. I would have no quams about telling someone off, and not think twice about it. In fact, I have had worked on reignig in being sarcastic and a big mouth.

Charlie Brown--I'm glad you were able to work on your problems with bullies. My late sone was always a target for bullies and he suffered from low self esteem and depression. But you wouldn't know it as the classic forms, because he would self-medicate through exercise or activity, he did have ADHD, so that would be part of the reasons for the activity, but then I think it was the cause of the bullying.

He was able to stand up for himself a month prior to his death, only to have a school administrator embarrass and humiliate him in front of his peers so much so that he did jump off a cliff.

I have another child that is very sensitive to the way his socks feel on his feet, mainly the seam at the toe as to be just right. They say this is a sign of highly intelligent children. Their sensitivity to things like this, he had other sensitivities as well.

Charlie Brown · Post by **Charlie Brown** » Mon Jan 17, 2011 7:58 am

Originally posted by Paisleegreen:
When I was younger, I was an easy target for bullies, and was picked on alot. After Columbine and other similar incidents, I thank God I never ended up like those students. In my 20s I became more street-wise and later self-confident. While I have 98-99% of the HSP traits, I have no problem being an extrovert, and defending myself verbally and physically. I would have no quams about telling someone off, and not think twice about it. In fact, I have had worked on reignig in being sarcastic and a big mouth.
Charlie Brown--I'm glad you were able to work on your problems with bullies. My late sone was always a target for bullies and he suffered from low self esteem and depression. But you wouldn't know it as the classic forms, because he would self-medicate through exercise or activity, he did have ADHD, so that would be part of the reasons for the activity, but then I think it was the cause of the bullying.

He was able to stand up for himself a month prior to his death, only to have a school administrator embarrass and humiliate him in front of his peers so much so that he did jump off a cliff.

I have another child that is very sensitive to the way his socks feel on his feet, mainly the seam at the toe as to be just right. They say this is a sign of highly intelligent children. Their sensitivity to things like this, he had other sensitivities as well.

I am heart-broken at your loss

. I am so, so sorry.

I am the same way with the sock seam!

I never equated that with being overly sensitive.

Molly77 · Post by **Molly77** » Mon Jan 17, 2011 9:34 am

Juno, I think there are varying degrees and traits of HSP's. If you fit some you are most likely considered an HSP. There is a middle gray area when it comes to defining things like this. Not black nor white. I agree that is more a trait of a personality than personality. I too have taken that questionnaire. I am considered an ENFP. I have read up on Carl Jung from which the basis for this test is from. I identify with both.

Charlie Brown, I too had been so badly bullied by my peers from the time I was able to go to school right up on through High School. Even after high school. I too had ADD and hyperactivity yet not to the degree to be diagnosed as ADHD. I know that almost all that energy came from anxiety. I too had depression from this yet it didn't show until I was a teenager. I was diagnosed with it when I was 16 years old.

Paisleegreen, I am so sorry about your son. Sometimes people really can add to the pain and suffering of another individual. *hugz*
I too have to have my socks sit just right on my feet or they drive me crazy. Seam has to be wear it is made to be or I start to feel almost a claustrophobic feeling. My boyfriend and even my best friend Becca, have come from sarcastic families. It really irritates me the way they just pass off talking like this to one another. Although, my boyfriends father has found talking this way to me is NOT appropriate. I told him so.

My best friend and i don't really get into it with her sarcasm..we have been friends so long, that I just accept it as her way..she is a very sensitive individual whom has had alot of pain in her life..it is how she got through it.