Making Progress is Fun!

[ellenfisher]

I was considering challenging my anxiety last week by going in an elevator alone in an unfamiliar building. I don't normally go in elevators unless it's impossible to get out of it (like six or seven flights) and then only with others. This was a big step for me. I debated and debated wether I would do it or not or wait until it was a more familiar place and maybe with family or someone else. As I was checking out at my Drs. office a 2 to 3 year old little boy was leaving with his parents. He started jumping up and down and begging to please, please take the elevator. Well, that was it. I used to love elevators when I was little too. I decided to go for it. I still almost went for the stairs at the last minute, but told myself I would be just fine. I was talking myself it calmness as I road the elevator down the one flight. It was slow and right at the end, I caught myself thinking... If those doors don't open I am going to freak out and panic. I told myself I would be fine, not panic and just call for help on the elevator phone. I was beginning to calm down again when the doors opened. I am so proud of myself! I felt kind of jittery for a minute, but just kept telling myself what a good job I did and that for me that was great progress. By the time I got to the car I was relaxed and calm and feeling like celebrating. I did give myself the last piece of pumpking pie at home to do a bit of celebrating. I even thought of stopping on the way home to do it again at another building. It wasn't practical, but it did make me laugh to think of me running around town riding all the elevators. That would have been a dream come true when I was a kid, like that little toddler at my Drs office. It is a dream come true and an answer to prayer to be making this kind of progress after where I have come from with my anxiety.