New here, but this seemed the most fitting section to post my success in

[ariadnesthread_]

I've had anxiety my whole life, even as a small child, I was plagued by weird depressions and panic attacks. As I got older, it only got worse. I hit puberty and clinical depression at the same time. I attempted suicide and ended up in the hospital at 15. The psychiatrist I went to had me on so many medications afterward, I felt like a zombie, my grades slipped and I felt like I couldn't think or even move sometimes. My self-confidence was low and I was the perfect target for bullies in high school. I had a chip on my shoulder my whole teenage life, the only way I would react was to overreact to anything, everyone seemed like a threat.
I grew up and started a string of bad relationships with men. Ended up pregnant at 19 and living with a guy who I didn't even really like, much less love, mostly because I was too passive to take control of my own life, it was easy to let him lead things. That relationship ended with him cheating and me catching him. That started the bitterness. I had anxiety about everything, my family would tease me about having a "phobia of Life". Little did I know they were pretty much on the money.
I tried college and did well for three years, then I met my husband. I ended up pregnant and being abused every day, a prisoner in my own house. He made war torturers look good, the mental, physical and sexual abuse I suffered at his hands was astronomical. I also ended up with another daughter.
Now on top of severe anxiety and depression, I also had PTSD from the abuse. I felt like a shell, what started out with him not letting me go anywhere turned into me not WANTING to go anywhere. Pretty soon I realized I COULDN'T go anywhere, then I knew I was in trouble. My panic attacks were massive and frequent just at the thought of leaving my house, yet they were just as bad at the thought of spending another minute in it with him.
I finally got rid of him when he left me for his mistress. Now I was shuffled off to family. I felt broken and used up. I actually was disassociated almost completely. The only emotion I could feel was anger.
I went to my local Women's Shelter after he left and had almost a year of counseling, which helped some, but it wore off pretty quickly. He would still come around and I was still terrified of him.
I did a little dating, but I was almost phobic of men in general, and not too many people want to date someone who can't leave her house. I struggled for almost seven years with agoraphobia. I became so bitter and angry, I didn't even recognize my own thoughts most of the time.
My grandma bought the Attacking Anxiety & Depression Program for me in 2005, but I was too jaded to even give it a chance, I stuck it in the closet and never looked back.
I met a great guy who became my best friend and fell in love with him. We got stuck in the friend stage for two years because he was leery of my agoraphobia and extreme bitterness towards men, I was desperately in love, but had no idea how to move forward, I was too scared to do anything.
In January of this year, after being an agnostic, (sometimes atheist, depending on how that day went), I had a breakdown. The mother of all panic attacks hit me one night as I was laying in bed. I really thought I was dying, my fingers, toes and lips were completely numb, my heart was palpitating, yet I knew it was just anxiety and nobody could help me. (That mantra ran through my head constantly, "Nobody can help me.")
Suddenly I turned my head and saw my grandpa's family bible I had kept since he died in 2004. It was like I was seeing it in surreal color, I don't know if you would consider it a miracle or just derealization, but I think God gave me a message. Suddenly I was in the corner of my room screaming and crying and praying to be forgiven for forgetting God. I could have swore I heard a whisper in my ear or maybe in my head saying, "All is forgiven." It was like someone had taken a backpack full of bricks off my back. I immediately felt better.
I called my best friend and sheepishly told him about it, not really expecting him to believe me. He was in Wal-Mart checking out and when he heard my story he quite literally whooped for joy and jump-clicked his heels together! He gave me a Bible of my own and answered a lot of my questions.
I noticed an immediate improvement in my thinking, I know now it got more positive. I started being able to make short trips, but I still felt pretty bad leaving my house. I couldn't drive at all. I got a much better attitude towards life though. Then my best friend and I started dating after two years of unrequited love. I was thrilled, but also scared that I wouldn't be able to get over my anxiety enough to ever be a true partner to him.
Then one night the thought of the the program program popped into my head when I was praying. Next think I know I'm dusting it off and listening to the CD. I noticed a great improvement by Week 2. I'm on Week 6 now and I feel like a completely different person. I'm even coaching my friends on the power of positive thinking!
And the big triumph was that this past weekend, I rode an hour and a half away with the love of my life to see our new house I'm going to be moving into next year! I was so worried that I would freak out, but when I told myself that I would be fine and even if I did freak, it would be okay and it would pass, I felt 100% better.
I ended up doing WONDERFULLY on the car ride and even when I was there. That was the first time in four years I had been that far from home. And the most comfortable I've been in a car in almost ten.
This program REALLY works. I would (and have) recommended it to all my friends and acquaintances.

~Wendi~

[Guest]

wow I am so proud of you it goes to show that negative thinking brings negative to our lives keeps us stuck in bad things, you have done so great I was deeply sadened by your story no one should have to go thru what you have people can be so mean but I am glad you have found someone to love you and be good to you keep us posted

[Guest]

Hi Wendi ,
I enjoyed reading your story!!! It sounds like to me that the Bible was a major turning point in your life!!!

Jesus sure is the answer to every single problem, which we face in this life!!! I could not make it through one day without HIM in it!!!

I always tell people...When all else fails, give Jesus a try, because HE will never ever fail you!!!

Thanks again for sharing your story!!! May God richly bless you!!!