Empowering Group Program Run-through part11

Gain an understanding of the various types of medications so you can make informed decisions on your long-term care.
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Ninjafrodo2
Posts: 234
Joined: Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:05 am

Empowering Group Program Run-through part11

Post by Ninjafrodo2 » Mon Jan 27, 2014 8:12 pm

Time to bust out all that alcohol and meditation, its party time! :P (on a side note, please do not mix your medication with alcohol)

We've covered alot of information so far in the program huh? There is much to keep in mind and I'm thinking it may be best to start to integrate this information in some way that will be easier to remember and apply to help move us forward, i'm still working on that and if anybody has any suggestions feel free to let me know.

The key parts to keep in mind are the following;

This is less about overcoming anxiety/depression and more about becoming empowered and positive. Its about expanding ourselves from our current positions and reaching for higher feeling states and mental states that are going to be uplifting and more satsfying so our lives become more enriched. Focusing on where you want to go, what kind of life you want to live is going to feel much better than trying to run away from a scary demon or scary body symptoms. The one you focus on more is the one you think about more and we all know that thoughts create feelings.

Its about focusing on the things that are going to help motivate us and see whatever we are doing and what is going on in a positive light. Life is about perception and if we can get ourselves to look at situations we are in or ones we will be in, in a positive light then we are much more likely to want to do the things that will make us feel better and much more likely to have a positive experience while we go and do those things.

Removing and replacing old habits of thinking that create the anxiety and depression in the first place and replace them with more positive ones.
ie.
Instead of being focused on our mistakes and beating ourselves up; We focus on our accomplishments and the attempts we make to build ourselves up

Instead of expecting things and people to respond the way we want to and try controlling them so they do; We focus on accepting things the way they are and working with them in order to be at peace with life

Instead of being problem oriented and worrying about this or that; Become solution oriented so we can find all the solutions that work best for us in order to eliminate these problems so we can return to feeling calm

Instead of holding stuff in or exploding on others; becoming assertive and respectfully telling your truth and having your boundaries.


Its about surrounding ourselves with positive people and things that are uplifting and doing things that feed ourselves and are an expression of ourselves or that we enjoy.


And its also about taking the little steps and focusing on where we are going and keep plugging away at it the best we can with what we have where we are and some days that could mean doing lots and other days that could mean doing little but as long as we keep heading in the direction, we will eventually get there.


Mike

THH
Posts: 860
Joined: Mon May 10, 2010 10:53 am

Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through part11

Post by THH » Tue Jan 28, 2014 6:30 pm

Mike,
I liked how you summed up everything this far. Its good. I can't think of anything to add except, we tend to be over thinkers. I like the phrase keep it simple, because I personally can get hung up on over thinking in general. Go with the flow. Give yourself the short version.

I personally do not drink. When I was young I had my share but I also live with an alcoholic so I have only seen the bad effects of what alcohol does to people and their families, loved ones and their lives. It is a progressive disease that robs in every way. I am familiar with AA I know many who attend, I only see how great it has worked for the ones I know. Like all these programs, they only work if you want it to, and you put forth an effort.

I like how the book talks about the use of pills as well. Pills are there to help you but pills alone will not work forever, the best thing is to help yourself change your thinking, it takes time and lots of practice but you can! I really do not have much experience with pills either.
I have taken Xanax as needed but only low dose. Part of my anxiety is HA and the fear of taking things. I could not become a drug addict as my fear of what that pill will do to me would over ride any pleasure. I did not say I would never because life has circumstances that cause things to happen you never would intend. But for anyone who may have these problems, I am not coming from a corner of judgment only from the corner there is hope. Addiction can be overcome.

I know my personality type and even my challenging family environments can cause me to feel anxious and depressed. I am getting tuned up with my thoughts that will help me deal with these situations.
Being more relaxed and confident feel so much better to me so there is comfort for encouragement.
I hope everyone going though this program is getting even just a little of what this program is offering. It does feel good to feel good! :D

Ninjafrodo2
Posts: 234
Joined: Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:05 am

Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through part11

Post by Ninjafrodo2 » Wed Jan 29, 2014 10:05 pm

Image

Hello everybody! So its been an interesting couple of days (today and the last 2), where I've reached deeper levels of understanding, deeper beliefs that are deeply tied into my anxiety. These are patterns of thought that I've been practicing for about 18 years at least and I have to say it is really interesting how what other people say and do can affect us and become apart of our psyche.

I did mention in a recent post of the thought that began my anxiety...it was about thinking I was doing something appropriate by making fun of another girl and then realizing that it was wrong and not trusting myself after that....well I have since realized that not only do I have that thought but I also have the thought of, "What-if I stand up for myself and I devastate the other person and they end up going through the same thing as me, I can't do that to someone else"...I also realized that because of not standing up for myself the only other way I could protect myself is through hatred and so in my mind I would hate these people and it would cause me to distance myself from them and not get close to them...I can't continue to live with either of those things and now am working really hard to replace those thoughts whenever they come up.

One other thing is a thought that I picked up from my mother...When I didn't obey her or follow through on her expectations then she would say "then don't ever ask me for anything" and for the most part I didn't because I didn't believe I deserved it and since then I didn't believe I deserved help at all and why would people want to help me when I haven't done anything for them? And as a result I became afraid of asking for help, even asking for directions and even worse, phoning people who are renting places out when i'm needing to move which is what I'm going through now...it even became so hard that placing an order over the phone was difficult...My mother was not right in what she did, she did the best she could in order to get me to listen to her and her best was not very good at all since she didn't get learn alot of important stuff in her own messed up upbringing and because I didn't know anything about this kind of stuff I just took it as fact and my mind just further twisted it! My friend says its like people plant seeds in us and this was like a weed seed that i'm just now starting to uproot and get out of there.

Speaking of seeds, I think it is perfect to mention this here. If we are not thinking positive then I think we are thinking negative and so I think that is why it is important to add those positive seeds so we end up having a beautiful garden....positive people, positive relationships, positive activities, positive beliefs and positive thoughts. Just thought i'd throw that out there.

Oh and I just thought that I'd mention in one or more of David D Burns's books he mentions a way to counter thoughts and that is what he calls testing the belief out. The purpose of this is to find evidence against the thought and in turn you become released from that thought...what came to mind for me today was to do just that with collecting evidence and having an "Evidence book". In this book you'd collect evidence about how you were actually able to overcome an anxiety attack and face a limitation and feel good, or how you were able to be assertive and you felt better for it, or people do care because they are spending time with you or complimenting you or giving you presents or whatever....its just another tool you could use if you'd like.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxPZh4AnWyk
This is another very powerful video...This is an amazing example of how its not just us who have irrational thoughts that don't reflect reality. The lady in this video even though she doesn't look like she fits into the idea of what a talented singer is doesn't mean that she isn't one. A majority if not everybody in that audience believed that she didn't have talent before she even started to sing and she proved them all wrong!!!!!! The biggest cognitive distortion going on there is Labeling....she didn't fit the label of a singer so people believed she wasn't capable of being one and yet people with the talent aren't always going to fall into the stereotype.

THH;
Yeah its true we can over think and make things alot more complicated...expectations and control!!! But for me, I'm still wanting to come up with something that helps me combine all that I've learned so that i'm using it on a regular basis so that i'm getting the most benefit out of what i'm doing. I actually just wrote out all the things that i'm doing (a couple were new things too) and wow the list is long but everything is so important and I want to make sure i'm doing the best job I can do.

I don't mean to criticize, just having fun...the only circumstance I can think of that would could make you a drug addict is if some pot heads or drug dealers wondered into your place and stayed there and pushed drugs onto you and because you find one of them really attractive and you don't want to hurt his feelings, you do it....lol

So like me, you don't have issues here with drugs and alcohol....I don't usually go to social gatherings but in those situations, I often use alcohol to enjoy myself and that could be something to work on but I don't go often and I have no intention of becoming an alcoholic or a drug addict, I don't feel good about taking drugs either perscription or recreational. But I am going to be taking some alternative herbal things that my chinese medicine doctor recommended for it and use that for the anxiety instead.


Mike

forever young 06
Posts: 284
Joined: Sun Jun 25, 2006 5:19 pm

Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through part11

Post by forever young 06 » Thu Jan 30, 2014 4:13 pm

there isn't a lot to say about this. I have never drank . I do take medication. I know it is not for every one. I also was afraid of medication and am not as afraid as I used to be. I feel a lot of people need medication for different conditions. It is nice to have antibiodics if we have a severe infection. a lot of people with anxiety are afraid of medication. I at one time was afraid to even take a Tylenol. I feel my meds aren't controlling my anxiety 100 percent so it does give me the ablility to work on it.

THH
Posts: 860
Joined: Mon May 10, 2010 10:53 am

Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through part11

Post by THH » Thu Jan 30, 2014 8:26 pm

Mike,
You have been busy, in a good way. I'm so happy that you have seen some of your anxiety and found a different perspective to view it from. A sign of growth!
It is odd how things others have spoken over us effect our being. We tend to focus on the negative, even if there were hundreds of good things said. I can relate in many ways. It is good you have identified with so many pieces of the puzzle. Another very empowering move! :D

Actually when I made reference to drugs, I was thinking about my Aunt who got hooked on pain meds. She has been through detox several times. She has a little dementia and forgets what she does. So some people do get hooked believing the pill will help and if I take extra I will get better faster!
LOL...being held up by pot heads! NOT! :D

Yes I am like you on this one. Let me know what herbs you take and how it works for you.

Forever Young,
I agree with you too, thank GOD we have medicines!!!! This program also teaches how working with drugs and CBT will possibly help a person not to have to take drugs. ( For anxiety ) There is no disgrace in taking meds. I too am afraid to take Tylenol! ( remember my nickel story ) lol...
The older we get the chances are we will end up on something!

THH
Posts: 860
Joined: Mon May 10, 2010 10:53 am

Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through part11

Post by THH » Thu Jan 30, 2014 8:30 pm

Mike:
What are those animals????? LOL... Strange feet. Big eyes, must be nocturnal. :mrgreen:

THH
Posts: 860
Joined: Mon May 10, 2010 10:53 am

Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through part11

Post by THH » Mon Feb 03, 2014 1:02 pm

Where is everyone??? Hopefully all is well.

I'm doing well, starting some projects that I actually enjoy. Had a good weekend, felt better no bothering anxiety.
I believe I have successfully gotten in touch with some thoughts that I was able to identify and omit them from my thinking.

I'll check back later as I think we start 12 today. :)

Ninjafrodo2
Posts: 234
Joined: Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:05 am

Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through part11

Post by Ninjafrodo2 » Tue Feb 04, 2014 1:20 am

Thank you very much THH I appreciate that and it is really starting to feel quite amazing actually. I feel like I have reached a certain threshold now, not so much with the fear facing but with the changing of the patterns of thought. I've been working on changing a bunch of them at the same time...
-focusing on my little accomplishments and my attempts and thinking "I did it" instead of focusing on the mistakes

-focusing on insults (its a couple videos of celebrities reading tweets of insults directed at them from people on twitter) and thinking "thats your opinion"

-focusing on loving myself unconditionally for all the wonderful qualities of who I am instead of hating myself and thinking how i'm not good enough

-replacing thoughts when I'd feel negative instead of them just coming up and me enduring them

-focusing on me being who I want to be instead of identifying myself as the anxiety sufferer who can't do this and can't do that

-feeling emotions instead of running away from or minimizing them

-focusing on the compliments of what others say and feeling good about them instead of brushing them off

-focusing on being thankful for all the good things in my life instead of focusing on how I don't have this or that

-focusing on how I want my life to be instead of focusing on how I hate it for what its not

and well there are a few more things that I am doing and want to add to this. It sounds like alot but in order to remember this all and keep my mind in this sort of mindstate I usually write many of these out for daily intentions...ie. Today I feel greatful for everything in my life or Today I feel an extraordinarily deep unconditional love towards myself and this really works for me! In fact i've already been exposed to a situation that would have really angered me in the past (someone's opinion of me when it comes to not working) but it barely bothered me and I don't feel bad that i'm not employed right now because I know that I am working and i'm working hard!

oh and those creatures I think might be Lemurs but i'm not completely sure.|


Mike

Ninjafrodo2
Posts: 234
Joined: Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:05 am

Re: Empowering Group Program Run-through part11

Post by Ninjafrodo2 » Tue Feb 04, 2014 12:59 pm

By the way THH what are these projects you speak of and what thoughts were you talking about?

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