Stress Center Peer Support

I have known for years that i am a total alcoholic. I am about 100 lbs. and i go out and drink 10+ beers. Imagine how in control i am! LOL Not so much! I feel so bad the next day. Throwing up, anxiety, scarey thoughts, guilt... u name it!! Not its not worth it...but thats why it's an addiction. I want to stop so bad for me, my 2 gorgeous kids, my husband etc... I say this now because i'm hungover but by day 4 or 5 of not drinking i feel so good, happy and feel the craving again and make up every excuse in my head that it's ok to drink...i don't have a problem...blah blah blah. I need help. I didn't binge drink for about 2 wks awhile back and actually went to the mall with my son just to hang out with him. Never have i done that! It felt so good but that night i screwed it all up. It's like i won't let myself be happy! Any advice anyone?

Oh my dear!
You need help. You can't do this by yourself.
I understand.
I highly recommend AA. There will be people there who understand. And it will help. You will receive a book with a program. And there will always be someone to talk to.

You will begin to like yourself.
I wish you the very best!!!
I wish you wellness!!!
MJ

Thanks for responding! I actually have the AA book and have been there in the past. My craving has always been sooo strong i make the excuses in my head "im fine and sooo many other people drink alot on the weekend and don't feel so bad for it why should i?" I actually would go to a rehab but the thought of leaving my kids is devistating! I need to figure this out and i guess when i'm ready to face it i will. Take care

When you say you can't leave your kids to go to rehab, please keep in mind that you leave your kids every time you drink - you can not take care of them until you take care of you.
I send to you only the best of luck, but you need to make a commetment - luck won't do it - as we all know, or we wouldn't be here.

BTW...I have struggled with alcohol myself, and have used my children as inspiration rather than a crutch. You can do it! You can overcome depression, anxiety, and alcoholism - it's been done before. I know, easier said than done, or I wouldn't be using the program today - I just try to think positive that this will be the answer I have been waiting for, and spend "drinking" time working the program or relaxation cd.

Yes, Tessha,
You can do it. You want to and you will!
I did it!!
20 years ago.
Oh how you'll like yourself!
Go ahead - make a start!
God bless!
MJ

teesha,
alot of us have walked in your shoes.like cornflower said and I will say this.I had drank for a long time nd when I was leaving germany on my last overseas assignment.I had been partying for a few weeks.I had a bad hangover and went to the airport.I had an hour to kill o I went and sat down and went to sleep.I woke up and there was no one there where I had checked in.they had moved the counter down the hall. I was so scared.after I got on the plane I ordered a coke and never drank again.I went to a bar when I got to my other assignment and ordered a soft drink.I never go to bars now and have been clean for over 20 years. we can not do it ourselves and it takes someone BIGGER then us to help.remember this you only live once and what you do for your selve and your family should mean the world to you.they feel your pain I am sure.I look back at the times I missed with my children when they were growing up.please do what you have to do to clean you life up and know that we will be there for you.take care and God Bless.
don
I could not do it but SOMEONE BIGGER THEN me helped.

Thanks all of u! You have no idea how much this meens to me that i have all of ur support. I went out last night thinking i was going to keep it under control but of course i didn't I ended up falling and hit my head so hard i had to get stitches. Wake up call? maybe...Whatever it is i need to get it out of me or i am going to die. My kids need me and so does my husbamd.
Please keep sending me ur possitive words it really does help!