Stress Center Peer Support

Okay so I know I'm not the only one who has been late to or missed work because of anxiety and/or depression, and usually I will just say "I'm sick." That prompted me to wonder what would we say if we actually told our bosses the truth?

1. "I can't come in today because I feel like I'm having a heart attack....okay, yes, I am a healthy 25 year old...no, I really am having a heart attack this time.."

2. "I will be late today because I'm glued to the toilet and you see we have a public restroom in the office so if I have to go that would be too embarrassing."

3. "I will be late today because I cannot stand staff meetings. I swear I will pass out during one of them, one of these days..."

Keep em going

"My neighbors friend and cousin who works near my neighbor and talks to her often has some sort of flu. It was either the swine flu, stomach flu. H1N1 , Malaria, The Plague or some sort of sickness that's really really bad and my neighbor came by and borrowed a cup of sugar from me last night and now I may have a fever so I am going to stay home and quarantine myself...Just to make sure I don't contaminate anyone. Okay? See you next week!"

:p

Come on people..This is fun

"hey boss, i'm pretty sure today is the day that i am going to die. i know i thought that the last 5 times i called in, but i'm certain it's today and my wish is to die at home...ok i'll see you tomorrow"

:p

"Well see boss, I have this little bump on my chin, and I guess it could be a pimple, but I'm pretty positive that I saw one of those brown recluce spiders in my closet yesterday. So if it's actually a bite then I don't want my face falling off at work. What would the customers, say?"

LOL ...good one

Oh Lord, I know how this goes. These are all real, of course.

Sorry, but I can't come in today:

1) Gravity might stop working and I'll fall off the planet on the way in to the office. I best wait until tomorrow to be sure.

2) I can't remember if I took my medications a few minutes ago. I'm pretty sure I did but I can't be totally sure. What if I'm just remembering taking them yesterday? I can't take them again, I might overdose.

3) I'm afraid I might forget where I live and not be able to get home. Or I might forget where I am and not know where to go from there. Dang, I really need one of those little ID bracelets from when I was a kid.

4) I ate something from a box/container that had a safety seal missing. I'm sure I've been poisoned. Can you call 911 for me?

5) I might run out of gas on the way to or from work. Yes, I know that my tank is full and the drive is only 12 miles. Yes I know that there are gas stations along the way. What if my battery dies then?

6) My back and legs are sore and stiff. I realize that I exercised hard yesterday, but I'm pretty sure that this is a sign that I'm going to be paralyzed from the waist down. I'd prefer becoming a paraplegic from home.

7) I can't breath. Yes I know that there's more air outside, but I like my home air better.

9) I think I have the flu. No I don't have a fever. No, no chills either. No, no vomiting. Yes, a mild headache I think, but it could get worse.

10) OMG, I skipped number 8. I'm finally going crazy. You don't want a crazy employee, do you?

very funny!!!!!!

Those are GREAT!
I'll think of a few to add! LOl...