taking suggestions

af · Post by af » Thu Jul 30, 2009 8:33 am

Does anyone have anything humorous I can use for when I go back to work on Monday? I have been off since Feb. with anxiety. I have recieved pro.help but have only been in this program for 3 weeks. I still get a pressure feeling in my head when I feel like they are looking at me, like why I was out or if I feel intimidated by someone. Also when I get really busy I get the same way and start thinking I am not going to be able to work. Thanks.

Robert perrette · Post by **Robert perrette** » Thu Jul 30, 2009 9:03 am

absolutely, 1st off congratulation on going back to work, im on session 3 also,and with all the writing on negatives and positives we all need a sense of humor,and thats just it,since i been doing this stuff, ive been getting back a sense of humor, my wife noticed, but she said i look better,and not being so serious about things,and i think you will find that when you get back to work,people will notice these things in you,what we dont see in ourselves people will see in us,all our good traits,like a sense of humor,a smile, a sense of peace,all these things will come back to us, and people notice, especially those closest to us.good luck with work, and keep smiling, guy walks into his therapists office hysterically crying,therapist says those feelings and emotions are coming out,guy says no, i got your bill today.ha,ha keep smiling.

jillzmind · Post by **jillzmind** » Thu Jul 30, 2009 6:14 pm

AF
I forget where I heard or read this but someone said that a co-worked was just in their face and being hostile and that they almost started to cry, when suddenly she just got a vision of this co-worker being a stalk of broccoli !! :p
and I guess it really calmed them and helped them? Will it help you? I don't know but I think it might help, haha Broccoli in a suit.
I think in time when the stress lessens you do find your humor again. I know I am finding mine.Of course I love to laugh and if I get down enough I will throw on some Jerry Lewis or some Marx Brothers. Take care and I hope you see things turning around for you real soon.

Jilly~

SeaRunner · Post by **SeaRunner** » Thu Jul 30, 2009 8:07 pm

AF -

So I scoured the internet for a relatively clean joke and found this (which was purportedly "the funniest joke in the world as named by Yahoo! in October of 2002"):

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his cell phone and calls emergency services.

He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator in a calm, soothing voice replies: "Take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's actually dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard.

Back on the phone, the hunter says, "OK, now what?"

SeaRunner · Post by **SeaRunner** » Thu Jul 30, 2009 8:10 pm

AF - Here's another one that I always thought was cute:

A three-legged dog enters a saloon and excalims "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw..."

SeaRunner · Post by **SeaRunner** » Thu Jul 30, 2009 8:19 pm

AF -

Okay, one last one, and it's a bit more racy so I hope I don't offend anyone:

A man wearing nothing but transparent underwear walks into a psychiatrist's office for an appointment. The psychiatrist takes one look, and say's "Well, I can clearly see your nuts."

Layha Rae · Post by **Layha Rae** » Fri Jul 31, 2009 2:53 am

Racy or not that one made me laugh out loud.

af · Post by af » Fri Jul 31, 2009 3:07 am

Thanks to all of you for the humor! I am a teacher and I also love to laugh! I will try the suggestions. I just get to work and think I can't do it, I'm not going to be able to work. Esp. when I start going full speed. My head starts getting crazy pressure in it. I am definetely going to check out this forum daily for laughs! I saw yesterday where someone said to watch "What about Bob." I've seen it and it is funny. He shows up to his therapist vacation home wearing a bright colored shirt with big letters that says I'M A LOCAL. You may have to be watching to get it, but it is funny

jillzmind · Post by **jillzmind** » Fri Jul 31, 2009 8:17 am

SR
The 3 legged dog one is an oldie but a goodie.

The two Hunters? That one I had never heard. It's a keeper. I know some people I have to share that with ASAP!
Thanks for sharing it.

Jilly~

poppy36 · Post by **poppy36** » Fri Jul 31, 2009 11:41 am

ha ha to the hunters very funny... more are very welcomed..