Just for Laughs - Beans

Somtimes it helps just to laugh.
Kimie28
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Jan 23, 2008 2:13 am

Post by Kimie28 » Thu Jan 31, 2008 5:44 pm

I got this forward in my inbox recently, I thought I would share it with everyone:

One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it became
apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up
beans.

Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home from
work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and told
him that I would be late because I had to walk home. On my
way, I passed by a small diner and the odour of baked beans was more
than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off
any ill effects by the time I reached home, so I stopped at the diner and
before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans.
All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas.


Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see! me and exclaimed delightedly:
"Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight."


He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took
a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone
rang. He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned
and went
to answer the call.

The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure
was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I
seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It
was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over
a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap
and fanned the air around me vigorously.


Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink
was worse than cooked cabbage.

Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room,
I went on like this for another few minutes.

The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone farewells
signalled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more
times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back
on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself.


My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned,
apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked through
the blindfold, and I assured him I had not.


At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated
around the table chorused: "Happy Birthday!"


I fainted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Guest

Post by Guest » Sun Feb 03, 2008 1:42 pm

LOL now that was funny

Hot Rod
Posts: 130
Joined: Mon Nov 29, 2004 2:00 am

Post by Hot Rod » Sun Feb 03, 2008 1:56 pm

LOLOLOLOL ROTF LOLOLOL THAT IS LOLOL FUNNY :D THANK YOU LOLOLOL ROTF AND SCARING MY SISTER
Focus on what you want, not what you fear...

Guest

Post by Guest » Mon Feb 04, 2008 8:31 am

Now that's hilarious. Thanks so much for sharing.

Guest

Post by Guest » Mon Feb 04, 2008 3:04 pm

That is horrible! I would die of embarresment!

Guest

Post by Guest » Mon Feb 04, 2008 3:36 pm

Originally posted by tallula:
That is horrible! I would die of embarresment!
That is histerical made my night

Guest

Post by Guest » Mon Feb 04, 2008 4:03 pm

Very funny!! Thanks for posting. I needed a good laugh. :D

Guest

Post by Guest » Mon Feb 04, 2008 4:56 pm

: That was too funny (ha,ha,ha)Sometimes I believe what they say..laughter is the best medicine..Since I've had this anxiety..I love to watch funny shows like Everybody Loves Raymond, King of Queens and Who's Line is it anyway..that's my therapy ;)

Guest

Post by Guest » Wed Feb 06, 2008 12:53 pm

That story was absolutely FABULOUS!!! I was hysterical! Thanks for sharing!!!

Guest

Post by Guest » Thu Feb 21, 2008 2:19 am

If you can't fart in front of your friends, Who can you fart in front of??

Post Reply

Return to “Humor for Anxiety”