Hey Danny,
Couldn't help responding to your post in that I asked myself the same questions years ago when struggling with scary thoughts. Through my journey with anxiety I believe I've answered alot of these questions:
1) As per "why do we have them....why do they (scary thoughts) pop into our minds?". First of all their is no "them". I know your reffering to scary thoughs but when we refer to scary thoughts as "them" or "it" we irrationally create an entity or our own boogeyman which is not reality. All we are talking about are obscure automatic thoughts. Much like our digestive system our brain digests everything i.e. disturbing movies, news articles, video games, television shows, ect.. Consequently we'll have a thought pop up for no apprent reason. Their is ample research supporting the fact that all humans get unintended, intrusive, spontaneous thoughts.
2) "Does this mean we have no control over our thoughts?" I guess a better question would be "Do we possess the ability to control our reaction to these thoughts?" Absolutely! As previously stated all humans get spontaneous thoughts however, we possess the ability to control our reactions to any obscure, irrational, intrusive thought. This is the key.
3) As per "Is it another voice telling me?" Those who hear other voices are diagnosed as schizophrenic and unaware that they are hearing these voices. Reality is the fact you recognized these thoughts as irrational serves as pure evidence you are of sound mind.
4) "Could I be crazy?" Again, those who are "crazy" are unaware that they are crazy. The mere fact that you asked yourself that question serves as more evidence to support the fact that you are of sound mind.
5) As per "If we beat ourselves up and we don't want to why do we?" When we begin to respond irrationally to these obscure thoughts we tend to ask ourselves alot of bad questions ie ""Am I crazy?". We further establish and reinforce alot of false conclusions about ourselves as well ie "Is it another voice telling me?" We irrationally conclude that these thoughts represent us in some way and tend to personalize these thoughts. Reality is these thoughts don't represent us in the slightest bit and all we are talking about is anxiety. Nothing more.
Our initial response is to attempt to eliminate these thoughts but what happens when we try not to think of these sunset? We think of the sunset. Attempting to block our scary thoughts just leads to variations of the thoughts themselves. It's the paradox of human control. (see white bear experiement). Our goal shouldn't be to elimiante the thoughts be casue all humans get thoughts of this nature. Our goal is to eliminate the anxiety, depression and frustration associated these thoughts.
Those prone to anxiety are sensitive and analytical. Two great traits but sometimes when we use these traits in a counterproductive manner it results in anxiety. Having strugled with this symptom of anxiety I have experienced the anxiety, depression and frustration associated with these thoughts. Through recovery however, I have experienced the renewed self confidence in eliminating the anxiety, depression and frustration assocaite with these thoughts. Through being employed as a coach for the StressCenter.com I've learned this symptom of anxiety is very common. Feel free to e-mail me anytime through this site or directly at
mikesc21@hotmail.com. Through my journey of anxiety I've learned alot about this particualr symptom of anxiety and have alot to share. I hope this response helps Danny. Take care.