Disturbing Sexual Thoughts!

John54 · Post by **John54** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:04 am

I am so glad I am not alone about these scary thoughts. Like so many others these thoughts started when I was in my teens. I was going out with a great girl, who I am actually still friends with today, and these thoughts started to occur. They started after I watched an episode of Dawson's Creek where one of the Characters came out of the closet. I was so scared and had no Idea what was going on. Eventually over time the thoughts stopped. But, recently since I have started this program these thoughts came back and are really scaring the hell out of me. I found this program after I thought about hurting people in my family. But, now I ahev moved passed that a draged up a thought from the past that is crippling my everyday life. I know over time they should go away and just knowing I am not alone on this topic as helped greatly. I also have a question about what is the best way to let these thoughts pass. The thoughts only thoughts thing worked for me before but it is a little harder this time.

Mary4012 · Post by **Mary4012** » Sun Dec 17, 2006 5:09 am

This is the first time I am writting but I have been reading the posts faithfully the past couple of weeks. Anyone that can give me advice I would greatly appreciate it. I too suffer from disturbing sexual thoughts and I am trying my best to accept them and let them be there but were I have the most difficulty is about worry when I am going to have the next thought. The ruminations sometimes are the worst part of the problem for me. It has me thinking sometimes will it ever end? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Deborah Ann · Post by **Deborah Ann** » Sun Dec 17, 2006 6:28 am

I too suffer with disturbing sexual thoughts. I have had them since I was a little girl. I finally worked up the courage to tell my Mom about them and what she told me surprised me.
She said, " Deborah, I had them when I was a little girl too." "I really believe" , she said,"that they are a generational curse that has been passed down through our family blood line". This made me feel better but it hasn't taken away my everyday struggle. I honestly believe that we are in a tug of war with our heads every day! There is a battle being fought around us for our lives and peace of mind. We have to fight with God's Word in our hearts coming out of our mouths!!! Jesus said, "IN THIS WORLD YOU WILL HAVE TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS. BUT BE OF GOOD CHEER, I HAVE OVERCOME THE WORLD!"
FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT OF FAITH!!! LOVE, DEB

~Noelle~ · Post by **~Noelle~** » Mon Mar 19, 2007 10:43 am

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Amber Lee · Post by **Amber Lee** » Mon Mar 19, 2007 11:37 am

Hi Noelle,

I think I can offer you some peace of mind. Check out "ocdonline.com" Click on the article, "I think it moved." After you read that, I think you'll feel a lot better about your sexual thoughts. I have them too. But, I just sort of laugh them off now. I hope this helps. Keep smiling, they are only thoughts, they aren't who you are.
Amber

Boon · Post by **Boon** » Mon Mar 19, 2007 12:01 pm

Trust yourself, Noelle. Practice this. You are right. The sexual thoughts are a side effect of obsessive thinking. The mind clasps onto anything and when you react (or overreact) the thoughts get louder and louder and they don't seem to go away. Then you fear them coming back and that is resistance. That resistance to what you are hearing is your source of pain. Practice allowing the thoughts to come and go. Doesn't matter what they are or what they say. Just allow them to be there without you judging them. Do not fight anymore. When I didn't give a hoot if I had the thoughts or not, they ceased to bother me anymore. I might hear a thought or two once in a blue moon and I just let it come and go.

Remember - your thoughts are lies. They are not who you are. Keep working on this. The website Amber Lee recommended will help to comfort you. Also, a good read is Stop Obsessing by Foa and Wilson and The Imp of the Mind by Lee Baer talks specifically about sexual thoughts and images and really is supportive and a feel good book.

Blessings.

mack · Post by **mack** » Tue Mar 20, 2007 3:16 pm

ONe of the best posts I've seen yet. I have these "beautifully" distracting thoughts a lot, and from what I'm finding in my search for health is that this Pure-O is slowly becoming more well known and finding a therapist who can notice it and help with problems is a little difficult. These thoughts have been a big part of my anxiety/depression for the last five years and it wasn't until recently with this forum and books that I've found something that describes my problems so well. I think we all have a problem letting go and letting these thoughts flow. I'm sure most of us are highly intellectual people with some control issues. There is a lot of time that goes by that i don't believe I can let these thoughts go, but I'm begging to. It's like learning a new instrument. It's very frustrating at first, but after lots of practice it becomes like second nature. My heart goes out to anyone who has to deal with this crap. Just know that there is help and people who care, just stick with it. You are not alone even though it may fell like it. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Change is very difficult and everything worth it is. PEACE and LOVE.

Deb 45 · Post by **Deb 45** » Wed Mar 21, 2007 5:50 am

I'll have to check out that 'I think it moved' site. Made me laugh to hear that. But it is oh so true. Man, its amazing how scared I get of getting the 'wrong' feelings. Why is sexuality so scary?

Most days I am not scared of these random sexual thoughts. The times it does come up is when I actually have a chance to get closer to people, men and women alike. It can be when I'm having a nice conversation with a female coworker at work for example. All of a sudden I'm afraid I'll stare at her chest or her butt. Worse yet, get caught. Then I just laugh to myself and in my mind picture myself screaming and waving my arms while running around in a circle "I looked at her butt, oh no I'm going to go blind. AHHHHHH" Sometimes that helps. Usually the work environment is really stressful. I wonder if that's the distraction...

Thanks for writing.

onward · Post by **onward** » Thu Apr 05, 2007 2:58 pm

Thank you all for your time and effort in adding to this page. We truly are all in this together.

I am 23 now and have experienced obsessive scary sexual thoughts to the point of sensitizing myself to children and other people. I know that I would not act on these thoughts. That is not the problem. The problem comes when my mind says "Even though you know you won't act on these thoughts, you want to." I know this is not true. I become afraid that I somehow repressed these desires all along. Even writing this is frighteneing. To make matters even more challenging, I feel guilty about things I did as a young teen and child. I never actually hurt or abused anyone. I need to remember that.

I need to remember that we grow and are never static. Life is a process. The thoughts and fantasies I had as a young teen have no relevance in regards to who I am now. The scary thoughts that I have now feed on whatever sore spots there are in my mind. I am human. I am growing. I'll recognise my thoughts as only thoughts and realize like someone said earlier, I am who is observing the thoughts.

I am thankful for you all, and I am thankful for this form of communication.

Bless.

~Noelle~ · Post by **~Noelle~** » Mon Apr 16, 2007 12:02 pm

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