fear of going crazy on my family
fear of going crazy on my family
helly ive been through the program a couple of times and have had great results. i am just stuck right now with this recurrent scary thought of doing something or going crazy and hurting my family (wife and 4 kids). i know now it will never happen but when i get stuck in that fear it is so darn hard to let go. i guess it doesnt help that there isnt much down time with a family of four and a wife that works full time. i just want to be able to let it go and live and stop focusing on all the bad stuff and try and remember all the good stuff that happens. i used to be that way. i could just let the neg go right on by and enjoy the good in things and people. i guess i just have to be strong and remember that focusing on the bad and being neg about it isnt going to get me anywhere except into an arguement and bring me and the family down. any help.
Re: fear of going crazy on my family
Hey bob,
I can identify with your post in that scary thoughts of which you described were one of my symptoms of anxiety. Every human has thoughts of this nature. In 1996 Dr. Eric Klinger research concluded that the average person has about 4,000 distinct thoughts in a six-teen hour day. Approximately 13 percent of these thoughts are spontaneous occuring without any intended purpose. Individuals reported that many of these thoughts were quite out of charecter, even shocking. Thus the average person experiences approximately 520 spontaneous intrusive thoughts each day.
We however are prone to anxiety and were born a little more sensitive and analytical than the norm. These are great traits bob but when used in a counterproductive manner we create a circle of anxiety for ourselves. We have spontaneous thoughts of which you described and chase these thoughts in a counterproductive analytical "what if?" manner establishing and reinforcing irrational conclusions i.e. "Why am I having these thoughts?" "What if I carry these thoughts out?" "I must be going crazy." ect.. Our initial reaction is to attempt to quit thinking of the thoughts themselves. What happens when we try to not think of the sunset? We think of the sunset. This just leads to anxiety, frustration and more variations of the thoughts themselves. We become fearful of the thoughts and ultimately question our sanity and insert question marks where God put periods ie. "I just get stuck in that fear...".
The good news is if we are capable of thinking ourselves into anxiety then we are capable of thinking ourselves out of anxiety.
Bob, the fact that these thoughts initially made you anxious is pure evidence that you are incapable of acting on these thoughts. Individuals who carry out thoughts of this nature are diagnosed as pathlogical and find these thoughts appealing. Their thoughts are not spontaneous in nature and they would be nowhere near this website reaching out for help.
The fear of going crazy is a very common fear accompanied with this symptom however the mere fact that you pose the question "Am I going crazy?" to yourself is pure evidence supporting the fact that you are of sane mind. Those who are "going crazy" are completely unaware they are.
Unmanaged stress leads to anxiety in that we begin to react in our old familiar ways. Bob know that through education and a sound recovery plan you are fully capable of insignificizing this symptom of anxiety and re-establishing your confidence like thousands of others. Reality is you are a success waiting to happen. Feel free to email me anytime for support through this website or directly at mikesc21@hotmail.com. I am employed as a coach for the StressCenter.com and have alot of experience with this particular symptom of anxiety. God bless and go for it!!!!
I can identify with your post in that scary thoughts of which you described were one of my symptoms of anxiety. Every human has thoughts of this nature. In 1996 Dr. Eric Klinger research concluded that the average person has about 4,000 distinct thoughts in a six-teen hour day. Approximately 13 percent of these thoughts are spontaneous occuring without any intended purpose. Individuals reported that many of these thoughts were quite out of charecter, even shocking. Thus the average person experiences approximately 520 spontaneous intrusive thoughts each day.
We however are prone to anxiety and were born a little more sensitive and analytical than the norm. These are great traits bob but when used in a counterproductive manner we create a circle of anxiety for ourselves. We have spontaneous thoughts of which you described and chase these thoughts in a counterproductive analytical "what if?" manner establishing and reinforcing irrational conclusions i.e. "Why am I having these thoughts?" "What if I carry these thoughts out?" "I must be going crazy." ect.. Our initial reaction is to attempt to quit thinking of the thoughts themselves. What happens when we try to not think of the sunset? We think of the sunset. This just leads to anxiety, frustration and more variations of the thoughts themselves. We become fearful of the thoughts and ultimately question our sanity and insert question marks where God put periods ie. "I just get stuck in that fear...".
The good news is if we are capable of thinking ourselves into anxiety then we are capable of thinking ourselves out of anxiety.
Bob, the fact that these thoughts initially made you anxious is pure evidence that you are incapable of acting on these thoughts. Individuals who carry out thoughts of this nature are diagnosed as pathlogical and find these thoughts appealing. Their thoughts are not spontaneous in nature and they would be nowhere near this website reaching out for help.
The fear of going crazy is a very common fear accompanied with this symptom however the mere fact that you pose the question "Am I going crazy?" to yourself is pure evidence supporting the fact that you are of sane mind. Those who are "going crazy" are completely unaware they are.
Unmanaged stress leads to anxiety in that we begin to react in our old familiar ways. Bob know that through education and a sound recovery plan you are fully capable of insignificizing this symptom of anxiety and re-establishing your confidence like thousands of others. Reality is you are a success waiting to happen. Feel free to email me anytime for support through this website or directly at mikesc21@hotmail.com. I am employed as a coach for the StressCenter.com and have alot of experience with this particular symptom of anxiety. God bless and go for it!!!!
Re: fear of going crazy on my family
mike i appreciate all of your help. you sound like you know your stuff. i feel like at one time i did too but i must be in a rut or something because i do not feel like i have the energy to move on. its pretty silly because i always have the energy to stay in anxious or depressed state but fearful to break out of it. i just love to play with scary thoughts. what the heck is that about. i think i might be taking you up on using your email. thanks, bob
Re: fear of going crazy on my family
Hey Bob,
I just wanted to add too, that you want to be compassionate with yourself as well...I know because I do the same thing when I am anxious or struggling with something, I want to expect myself to be at top-shape in my mind, but part of what creates the anxiety is EXPECTING that of ourselves.
I don't know if you can pinpoint the rise in your anxiety to any particular situation, but for me personally, I have felt some of my old obsessive habits coming back recently after I ended a relationship I had been in for a year and a half. Times when we are going through change, or stress at work, or relationship difficulties, are times to extend that grace to oursleves of - Okay, I am going through something really anxiety-provoking and difficult for me right now, so of course I am feeling anxious, of course I am having some of those scary thoughts come back again, but I'm going to be okay, I can handle this, it's nothing I can't handle. I'm going to take care of myself and float through this, I'm going to exercise and spend some time with people who are uplifting and positive, distract myself with a good book or movie, and I'll be okay, it's just anxiety."
Or, if you can't pinpoint what it is that is making you anxious, just know that you are going through a bump and give yourself permission to feel that way and just get focused on good, positive stuff!
I think a lot of our obsessive thinking comes from boredom.
Don't know if that applies to you, but I know it does to me!
I just wanted to add too, that you want to be compassionate with yourself as well...I know because I do the same thing when I am anxious or struggling with something, I want to expect myself to be at top-shape in my mind, but part of what creates the anxiety is EXPECTING that of ourselves.
I don't know if you can pinpoint the rise in your anxiety to any particular situation, but for me personally, I have felt some of my old obsessive habits coming back recently after I ended a relationship I had been in for a year and a half. Times when we are going through change, or stress at work, or relationship difficulties, are times to extend that grace to oursleves of - Okay, I am going through something really anxiety-provoking and difficult for me right now, so of course I am feeling anxious, of course I am having some of those scary thoughts come back again, but I'm going to be okay, I can handle this, it's nothing I can't handle. I'm going to take care of myself and float through this, I'm going to exercise and spend some time with people who are uplifting and positive, distract myself with a good book or movie, and I'll be okay, it's just anxiety."
Or, if you can't pinpoint what it is that is making you anxious, just know that you are going through a bump and give yourself permission to feel that way and just get focused on good, positive stuff!
I think a lot of our obsessive thinking comes from boredom.
Don't know if that applies to you, but I know it does to me!Re: fear of going crazy on my family
hey mike, you are right. my only problem is i realize all the situations that are going on in my life that is creating all of my anxieties when it is too late. i will start being more foregiving to myself and let myself be anxious and angry sometimes without analyzing everything all the time. i love to play with the scary thoughts in my head for some odd reason. i get mad sometimes because i feel like i used to know my whole situation with where my anxieties (panic attacks) originated and i did the research to figure out what i had and it was sooooooo self satisfying and motivating but now it seems like ok that was back in 1996 and still sometimes i feel like ok whats wrong with me. man that pisses me off. i have to face this like a man and understand that i am creating this fear and i can unlock my freedom. i will. thanks for all of your help mike. it means so much to me.
Re: fear of going crazy on my family
Hey Bob,
In regards to your statement "realizing your anxieties until it's to late....". I can completely identify with your statement in that I went through a similair growth spurt. I initially beat myself up for allowing unmanaged stress to become anxiety (ie. scary thoughts) however, in hindsight I found this was nothing more than a growth spurt. Reality is through this growth spurt I developed a better understanding of my anxiety which enabled me to develop and implement an effective continuing care program.
In regards to "I love to play with my scary thoughts in my head for some reason.....". I've found through my experience that I wasn't managing my stress effectively thus I allowed this stress to become anxiety . My symptom of anxiety are the scary thoughts of which you described. When my stress became anxiety I allowed myself to get caught up in an abyss of automatic thoughts and became extremely frustrated. This resulted in re-inserting seeds of belief in these thoughts and "what if'ing" myself into a circle of anxiety. Every human gets intrusive thoughts. How we respond to these thoughts is the key.
In regards to "I get mad sometimes becuase I feel like used to know my situation....man that pisses me off..". I can completely identify with how you feel Bob in that I felt the same. Reality is however that this is truly a growth spurt in which you are developing a better understanding of your anxiety and re-establishing your confidence. With anxiety alot of individuals think in terms of elimination and "good health bad memory" kicks in. Meaning they have insignificized their scary thoughts and quit doing what they did to initially re-establish their confidence. We are human thus we are fallable, get off your own back. Knowledge is great but "knowledge in action" is where we develop and sustain emotional muscle.
Reality is you have successfully insignificized your scary thoughts before thus this is pure evidence you are capable re-establishing yourself. E-mail me any time at the aforementioned e-mail address should you need to process any of these thoughts. Bob, it's not a matter of if you re-establish your confidence it is a matter of when you re-establish your confidence. God bless and go for it!!!!
In regards to your statement "realizing your anxieties until it's to late....". I can completely identify with your statement in that I went through a similair growth spurt. I initially beat myself up for allowing unmanaged stress to become anxiety (ie. scary thoughts) however, in hindsight I found this was nothing more than a growth spurt. Reality is through this growth spurt I developed a better understanding of my anxiety which enabled me to develop and implement an effective continuing care program.
In regards to "I love to play with my scary thoughts in my head for some reason.....". I've found through my experience that I wasn't managing my stress effectively thus I allowed this stress to become anxiety . My symptom of anxiety are the scary thoughts of which you described. When my stress became anxiety I allowed myself to get caught up in an abyss of automatic thoughts and became extremely frustrated. This resulted in re-inserting seeds of belief in these thoughts and "what if'ing" myself into a circle of anxiety. Every human gets intrusive thoughts. How we respond to these thoughts is the key.
In regards to "I get mad sometimes becuase I feel like used to know my situation....man that pisses me off..". I can completely identify with how you feel Bob in that I felt the same. Reality is however that this is truly a growth spurt in which you are developing a better understanding of your anxiety and re-establishing your confidence. With anxiety alot of individuals think in terms of elimination and "good health bad memory" kicks in. Meaning they have insignificized their scary thoughts and quit doing what they did to initially re-establish their confidence. We are human thus we are fallable, get off your own back. Knowledge is great but "knowledge in action" is where we develop and sustain emotional muscle.
Reality is you have successfully insignificized your scary thoughts before thus this is pure evidence you are capable re-establishing yourself. E-mail me any time at the aforementioned e-mail address should you need to process any of these thoughts. Bob, it's not a matter of if you re-establish your confidence it is a matter of when you re-establish your confidence. God bless and go for it!!!!
Re: fear of going crazy on my family
thank you mike i am so lucky to have people like you in this world i know one day i will be making someone else feel just as good. ( i think i do now)