Stress Center Peer Support

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I have to answer yor post b/c I JUST had a 30 minute talk with my husband on the subject of my thoughts about his exes. I get obsessed about how I compare to them and if they were better partners than me!
I too wonder about OCD. It's my understanding that both obsessions AND compulsions are involved. Like you might be obsessed that there are germs on your hands, so you spend all day washing them over and over- the compulsion.
Your unwanted, repeated, persistent thoughts sound similar to mine. There are a couple of topics I just can't quit thinking about. When they get overwhelming is when the depression and anxiety hit me hard. So I signed up to see a counselor to get more defined help in that area. I start in a couple of weeks.
I've googled OCD but it's really hard to self-diagnos, and it's probably a lot better to leave that to the doctors. I have to keep telling myself that the more important thing is to get some help with whatever I might be dealing with.
Good luck and best wishes to you.

Yes, obsessive thinking is considered OCD but it's not something to fear and it IS cureable. Please do your best to understand that you do not need to fear it. It isn't even that painful to cure.

The obsessive thinking part of OCD takes the understanding that when you learn to become the observer of your thoughts, when you allow them to come and go without your attachment to them, you can release them easily. It takes practice to do this, yes, but that's OK. So it takes time. Now you know what to do. Many of us have been experiencing this for 40 years but we didn't have the tools so long ago. You have them early. That's good news.

The key is to not resist your thoughts. Ok, you obsess about your husband's exes. Just continually say "Whatever" and allow those thoughts to come and go. Don't go into a conversation about them. Just allow them their passage. They'll lose their power over time and you'll notice the thoughts coming less and less.

You do not like these thoughts so they keep coming back. Be indifferent to them by practicing "Whatever". See for yourself how you disempower them.

You really don't have to "know" anything in order for the anxiety to leave. Practice all the time. You'll find your peace.

Another thing you can do is to write up a Worst Case Scenerio using the very thoughts that trigger your anxiety. It is really beneficial in desensitizing to our triggers. You write a horrible, horrific scenerio for about 20 minutes. Don't fix anything. Make it really awful. Then read it daily for 45 minutes until there is no longer any "charge" to the words. You'll get really bored with it in a short time.

You're doing a great job. Don't give up because you really are in the right direction. You will heal from this.

Satu

Just a small addendum - be careful about what you read on the internet. It is a fantastic tool and there is so much information it can be overwhelming - and you will certainly find and article or two that will convince you that you do have OCD, just as you will find many articles that can convince you that you don't, if that is the information you want to hear right now. Remember, everything is processed through your current state of mind, and if you are looking for OCD symptoms, you will find them.

For now, relax, there is nothing you can do today. Make that appointment with a professional and they will test you and then discuss the results. Then you will have help available, and you won't have wasted all this time worrying about something you may or may not have. And remember - this is cureable, this is temporary, this too shall pass.

Best of luck.