I let the anxiety attack destroy me
I am in the 8th week of the attacking anxiety program and I really believe that all of these session had taught me how to effectively deal with stress and anxiety. In my daily life I have been able to stop myself from having a panic attack. Yesterday, I took a three hour exam and found myself in tears by the end of it. I felt my mind raising and could not settle them to concentrate on any of the essays. I knew this material and could not communicate it. I walked out of the exam feeling like I would never be able to overcome this anxiety and reach my goal of obtaining a phD. The worse part was all of my classmates could see that I had been crying and I felt them judging me. I feel defeated!
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Guest
First of all you have made alot of progress from the sounds of it and you should be very proud. Unfortunately the road to recovery is never a straight line. There are going to be situations that you might not have a great outcome from but you are still growing. Give yourself a break, essays can be extremely stressful for many diffrent reasons and i'm sure you weren't the only one feeling the stress. The best thing you can do about this situation is to figure out what went wrong. What were the thoughts you were having? Where was your focus? If you can learn from this situation and grow then you will be better equiped to face it the next time.
As for being judged. What if you saw someone else who was struggling with the same exam you were and they were crying while doing it? Would you honestly think poorly of them or would you be more sympathetic because you know the same pressures? When people are undergoing stressful situations, they aren't likely to make fun of the other person. Today actually is a perfect example. I went to pick up some stuff from my friend's place. I didn't realize how many things i left and so i had a very difficult time. I was pushing a table on a mini dolley, I had a backpack with the table legs and a couple pound jar of chinese herbs in liquid as well as a bag with a bread maker. So i had to travel 6 blocks with all this stuff as well as take the subway. Nobody was making fun of me (even though i was thinking that i must look rediculous) and in fact i had 3 people offer to help me out by carrying a few things for me. They didn't ask me for anything, they just helped me out just for the sake of helping me out. People are more sympathetic then we give them credit for.
Mike
As for being judged. What if you saw someone else who was struggling with the same exam you were and they were crying while doing it? Would you honestly think poorly of them or would you be more sympathetic because you know the same pressures? When people are undergoing stressful situations, they aren't likely to make fun of the other person. Today actually is a perfect example. I went to pick up some stuff from my friend's place. I didn't realize how many things i left and so i had a very difficult time. I was pushing a table on a mini dolley, I had a backpack with the table legs and a couple pound jar of chinese herbs in liquid as well as a bag with a bread maker. So i had to travel 6 blocks with all this stuff as well as take the subway. Nobody was making fun of me (even though i was thinking that i must look rediculous) and in fact i had 3 people offer to help me out by carrying a few things for me. They didn't ask me for anything, they just helped me out just for the sake of helping me out. People are more sympathetic then we give them credit for.
Mike
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Guest
Sunset....I am a Registered Nurse. I remember taking my Boards and all around me I was surrounded with friends and classmates that were increasing their anxieties with their inflated talk and worry about what was going to be on the test and so on. What I did was disconnect myself from the group due to this overwhelming talk, took the bus with a senior citizen group to Atlantic City where m boards were, took my Relaxation book I bought, AND FORGOT ABOUT THE EXAM altogether...I studied as much as I could, I said to myself if I didnt know it by now I will never know it...I ACCEPTED MYSELF AT THAT TIME and let fate take the ride with me. I even had a few martinis one night which they frowned upon...BUT I PASSED. Because I ACCEPTED my knowledge of what I learned in my head, disregarded my friends and classmates temporarily. AND STAYED BY MYSELF. In the end...my friends would come up and say...OMG...you stayed alone in the hotel room, you drank, AND I enjoyed the beach and casino and NEVER EVER WORRIED ABOUT IT....I am an RN now. I hope this helps for I know what I went through at that time.........and another thing......I also had lost my father 3 months before the boards...so that made it more the worth of relaxing and letting it go into the hands of God. creamcheese