Stress Center Peer Support

I'm using this survey to put things into perspective as I have many irrational and illogical beliefs that i'd like to change.

#1 Would you look down on someone who expressed negative emotion like anger or sadness if it was rational?

#2 How about irrational?

#3 If it was towards you?

#4 Would you cut them out of your life if they got upset with you & got into a meaningless argument?

#5 Would you consider someone to be stupid or retarded if they got angry or sad?

#6 How would you respond to someone if they did get upset?

#7 How would you respond to someone who was having anxiety or panic?

#8 How many times have people tried to take advantage of you after you've done something stupid?

#9 Do people treat you like you are COMPLETELY stupid if you embarass yourself?

#10 Do you feel embarassed when you make a mistake?

#11 Has making mistakes ever helped you out?


Feel free to input comments as well as answers.

Thank you in advance

Mike

Ninja/Mike -

Below are my responses.

#1 Would you look down on someone who expressed negative emotion like anger or sadness if it was rational?

Absolutely not. We're human and part of that is having and expressing emotions.

#2 How about irrational?

I think many of our emotional responses are at least in part irrational. So my answer to question #1 still applies for the most part. However, if the person chronically sees things in an irrational light and constantly overreacts, I would try to point these things out and help them see things more in perspective.

#3 If it was towards you?

My nature is to be compassionate and a problem-solver. If someone is angry or sad about something I've done, I always want to find out what I've done. If the issue is reasonable, then I try to do what's needed to correct the situation and diffuse the negative feelings.

#4 Would you cut them out of your life if they got upset with you & got into a meaningless argument?

If it was infrequent and wasn't overly traumatic, then no. However, if they constantly got upset with me and wanted to argue for no reason then, and I wasn't at fault, then I would at least distance myself. It's not healthy to surround yourself with negative people.

#5 Would you consider someone to be stupid or retarded if they got angry or sad?

Of course not. Everyone gets angry and sad. Everyone. I try to be compassionate and help others work through their problems when I can.

#6 How would you respond to someone if they did get upset?

Usually I find the best approach is to help the person see things in perspective and try to make sure their feelings are proportional to whatever is upsetting them. I also try to just listen and let them get their feelings out.

#7 How would you respond to someone who was having anxiety or panic?

I would try to be supportive, compassionate, but not coddling. I would try to help them understand that the panic and anxiety will pass and they can get better. I would offer the tools that we are learning in this program.

#8 How many times have people tried to take advantage of you after you've done something stupid?

I'm not sure I understand what you're asking, but there will always be people that will try to take advantage of you. These are the people that you want to consider whether it is healthy to to have them in your life or at least in a close relationship or friendship.

#9 Do people treat you like you are COMPLETELY stupid if you embarass yourself?

Some people do, but they're usually not the people that really care about me. But more often than not, I just am imagining that they think I'm stupid when in fact that's not the case. It's just my own insecurities.

#10 Do you feel embarrassed when you make a mistake?

Often, but I have low self esteem. I'm working on that and I'm getting better at realizing that mistakes are a part of life and no one is perfect. Why then should I expect me to be perfect?

#11 Has making mistakes ever helped you out?

Of course. Making mistakes is often the best way to learn something. Mistakes are not the same thing as failure. You can often tell someone not to do something, but the lesson is often much better understood when they do it anyway and have to deal with the consequences.

Thank you for your input you made some very helpful comments.