moving along

[early58]

I just started thr program last week. I have listened to the 1st 3 cd's but althought I have always had anxiety and dysthymia (which I control with celexa and klonopin, my main reason for joining the program are my low self esteem and worry. I've had problems in all of my jobs because I am too sensitive and don't know how to react when I've made a mistake and someone tells me my best isn't good enough. I don't know if I should apologize or take up for myself when It wasn't my fault. Is it okay to move ahead and do more sessions a week? I'm starting a new job on July 5th and don't want to continue the way I have all of my 30 year working life! I always have a feeling of empending doom before I go to work and waste weekends worrying abou the next day, am I going to make a mistake, will they think I'm stupid, what if they don't like me, what if I get fired.... and on and on.......

[couturesugar]

I can really identify with what you're saying. For a long time I had the hardest time with criticism, even when it was meant to be constructive. I think this has to do with our desire to seem perfect and in control at all times.. if people critique us (which is valid in a work environment) than they must know that we're not as perfect as we attempt to show them that we are. Session 4 talks about expectations and how we expect so much from ourselves and from others; it's a recipe for anxiety and unhappiness. Go through that session and think about all of the unrealistic expectations that you've internalized and how you can go about changing them.

If you're starting a new job, that means that they liked you and have faith that you can do the job. Give your employers the benefit of the doubt! Work through some of your negative thoughts/feelings that you're having about your situation and you'll find yourself with less worry

Good luck and let us know how it goes..