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weisercowboy · Post by **weisercowboy** » Mon Nov 22, 2010 5:02 am

Just wanted to say Hi and join the forum suggested in the program. I am really afraid of dying. I have been ever since I was about 12 years old when I had to have heart surgery for aeortic stenosis. Shortly after my grandfather had a heart attack so I have been worried about that all of my life. I recently, well 2 years ago had surgery again because my valve wore out. I was great the first year! I ran about 10 to 15 miles a week lifted weights, and did an ab routine 3 or 4 times a week. I take some meds for my condition to help with blood pressure to help protect the valve. When I started having problems with anxiety I was running and would have an adrenline rush which would start my heart pounding while I was running. I started freaking out because I knew I was damamaging my heart! So I stopped excersising and my anxiety got worse. I started having to take more metoperol a medication for an arrithmia and high blood pressure. I became afraid to run and my anxiety just go worse! I was afraid to do anything like even move it was hard to go to work, my job is pretty physical. My cardiologist suggested I go to a regular doc and go on antidepressants. I did. That seems to help with the overall anxiety but I still have anxiety. My doc asked me to keep track of my blood pressure so I take it from time to time. The other day I had to get my sons cat from his moms. I got him and his stuff and put him in the car. It is about 20 miles from her house to mine the cat Rocky howled the whole way home. I tried to get him to come up front so I could comfort him. He did once then went back to the back. For some reason this freaked me out! When I got home I brought him in the house then, because I knew I was anxious I took my pressure. It was 155/84 that really freaked me out! I knew if I got to my moms house I would be ok. It only took me 5 min. I felt a little better. I changed and listened to the relaxation cd that helped a bunch! Thats me!

Paisleegreen · Post by **Paisleegreen** » Wed Nov 24, 2010 1:08 pm

Welcome, Weisercowboy! I'm glad you were able to work out your stressful event. I've been told to do easy aerobic exercise to help to feel calm. But I can see that your running could make you feel more tense. There are others that have had some panicky feelings due to extra adrenaline during exercise, so you are not alone.

What anti-depressant are you on, if you don't mind saying.

karmatism · Post by **karmatism** » Wed Dec 01, 2010 1:51 pm

Welcome. I think you have a pretty legitimate reason to be freaked out! I think I would obsess about my health if I was dealing with what you're dealing with. That's not to say that you shouldn't take control and learn these tools. You made a great decision.

From what I've learned so far in school, the BP you're talking about shouldn't scare you that bad. The top number is the systolic and it's the pressure generated when your heart beats. It's the number affected more by stress, which is likely why you saw a spike when you took it after being stressed out. Obviously it's not good for it to be chronically elevated, but just it sounds to me like what you saw is due more to an adrenaline spike if your numbers usually aren't that high. Anyway, the bottom number is the diastolic and it's the pressure remaining when your heart relaxes, which should be around 80, so you were right in that range. Hopefully this gives you some comfort. I remember feeling that way when I was pregnant. I got high BP and I would stress everytime I thought about my stress affecting it! Isn't it great what we do to ourselves?

Anyhow, welcome to the program! I was telling another new member that you will learn on session 2 how to stop 'fearing the fear' so you can stop doing this to yourself. Just take a deep breath and feel good that you are about to learn the tools to get this crap under control!