Out of Rhythm

GI822 · Post by **GI822** » Sun Jul 06, 2008 12:47 pm

Hello everyone,

Do you ever feel like you have a pattern and when you go out of sync, it makes you nervous. I have a full time job m-f and usually it's hard for me the first 2-3 days but by Wednesday I am in a pattern of getting used to being at work. But when Friday comes and I am finally feeling comfortable being at work, its the weekend again. I'm happy it's the weekend but then I am nervous about how am I going to feel Monday and that cycle starts all over again. I've been feeling like this sine June. I was doing fine before then. I also feel nervous leaving work, like for lunch etc... like it's such a battle out there driving and it's so bright from the sun somedays it just seems overwhelming. I know it's my anxiety at work here but I would think after a month of this, I would be used to it by now. My biggest fear is not being able to go to work, which would mean to me not living a normal life. Our work just implemented a 4 day work week to save on gas, which is great, but that means I can't leave work until 6pm when I usually leave at 5pm. So I used to leave at like 4:55 to beat the rush of traffic but now I'm afraid of staying until 6 will make me drive right into rush hour, which I hate. Its just so overwhelming when I think about it. I take for granted the time I could drive to work without a care and come and go as I please. For now I can't; I hope that changes soon.

Anna Burrell · Post by **Anna Burrell** » Sun Jul 06, 2008 1:08 pm

I can understand where you are coming from! I have kind of been in a funk myself. I go through phases where I feel great. I feel like my medication is right, and my anxiety is almost nonexistent, and just when I start to get comfortable it all comes rushing back.
Usually when I am at work I think about how much longer I have to be there and then worry about the drive home. Usually following a work day I have a day off so that helps a little. When I wake up the next morning totally dizzy and weak feeling I dread work the next day.
Then same as you I feel like I can't go to work.
I know how you feel, and I still get nervous no matter how many times I tell myself its just anxiety. I hope that soon you will start to feel better!

GI822 · Post by **GI822** » Sun Jul 06, 2008 1:20 pm

Thanks Anna. It's good to know others feel the same.

Chameleon82 · Post by **Chameleon82** » Tue Jul 08, 2008 2:52 pm

Hi guys. I can't stand being at work, but I think it's my job - well I guess it's me at this job. I mean I really really LIKE my job, and want to do it and be successful at it, BUT I can't stand being there because I always feel unprepared, nervous, unable to focus, not confident, and like there is too much open space. I make my own schedule, so more and more I've been working less and less. Even when I highlight my hours, if I don't have an appointment, but there are other things I could do, I'll just leave. I can't stand it. Then I just want to go home, read a bunch of articles about ideas/things I can use with my clients, "organize my life", and get prepared for the next day, but I CANNOT FOCUS at home either and/or I can't even stay awake to do anything productive. So everyday I am just totally miserable. It was actually too much to handle so I just stopped going without warning anyone. LOL! That's not funny, but it's totally messed up. So my questions is why is it difficult for you guys to go to/be at work. For me, I think it's my fault because I'm unorganized/unprepared, bit at the same time all I EVER WANT is to be organized, but it never happens. It was too much stress and responsibility to handle at once. Ok I'm rambling =)...

joplin · Post by **joplin** » Sat Jul 12, 2008 3:33 pm

Hi Chameleon. I think I know how you feel. I have been having a great deal of difficulty going to work. Now I am thinking that I can't do my job and am also beginning to absolutely hate it. I have never felt so stupid and unorganized as I do in this job. I don't have any difficulty driving there - but I do start late and end late mostly because I think it's a waste of time to drive in traffic. Many mornings, I just cannot make myself get up and go, or to call in. Advice anyone?

Xeenah · Post by **Xeenah** » Sat Jul 12, 2008 4:38 pm

Sounds like a lot of anticipatory anxiety with worrying about Monday on Friday. I can relate, been there. It will get better the more you practice the program, just keep thinking that those thoughts are good for you because it gives you the ability to implement the new tools you have from this program. The only way to get better is to practice the appropriate steps and retrain your brain with new thinking patterns. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. One of the best things Lucinda said for me was it is something like how we perceive things and the way we react to them that are keys. I try to see things differently now and not over-think or over-analyze because that is my old obsessive behavior. Baby steps; it does not change overnight but the more you practice the more it wil replace old behaviors.

Jazelle · Post by **Jazelle** » Sat Jul 12, 2008 5:23 pm

Thank you for your post GI822! I'm so glad to hear that others have an issue with "structure" at their job expecially with working hours. My boss has scheduled me from 10-7 now as that benefits the CORPORATION for productivity hours.
It stinks as a "single" person as far as family or social life for me! I have to speak to her about this as soon as she gets back from vacation next week. I also work many Saturdays. Procrastination has taken a deep root with me talking to her, but things will not change for the better until take ACTION!
Thaks for all your posts on this subject!

bevhembree · Post by **bevhembree** » Thu Jul 17, 2008 6:06 pm

Weekends blow me out of the water b/c I'm out of my routine. On the other hand, I've been to my folks twice in the last six weeks and feel less anxiety than I do at home, where I'm alone as a stay home mom until hubby arrives. I may post later about that and see what people think. It's weird.
But making plans for the times you will be out of your routine helps fill the time and take your mind off of it.