Stress Center Peer Support

I've posted a little bit of my problem on other threads, but I just am feeling anxious right now due to DD and DH have decided to see a loan office about getting a new mortgage on our house. This is worrisome for me because that means they would need an appraisal and as I
ve state elsewhere we not ready for an appraiser to come to our house.

It would me serious work to be done in a short amount of time, such as maybe a week or so. I am already stressed and working on reducing it and being assertive, etc. Anyway, I've had a discusssion w/ DD just now to clarify what exactly is this appraisal going to entail.

I really don't have it in me right now to clear things up in a rushed way. It is Christmas Time and I have part of my week days committed and we still have a Master Bathroom to remodel. We're just barely talking about getting someone over to give us a bid on the shower install.

Also, the backyard isn't ready for pictures, my eldest son still have his old car parts lying around and we have unfinished landscaping projects. I really do not like this and the feelings I'm feeling right now.

Any encouraging words would be welcomed. I'm heading off to my volunteering assignment.

Paislee

Hi Paislee, who are DD and DH?
Are you worried about the appraisal b/c you, like a lot of us, are a perfectionist? I've been trying to let go of a lot of that stuff...it's hard though...it sounds like also you're having trouble finding your voice with DD and DH?

Hi Sherry-DD stand for Dear Daughter and DH is Dear Husband. Thanks for writing me. Well, we aren't qualified to refi, which I'm glad as that would put too much pressure on me and really the rest of the family. I don't know what DH and DD were thinking.

I talked to someone else about it and they said that it cost more to get a new loan for a 15 year mortgage then to just start paying extra a month to bring down the principal.

And it wasn't right of DH to be talking about this of stuff w/ my DD instead of me.

There are two things that DH has been doing since I've been getting more assertive, one was to try and have his father come live with us and now saying he is going to get a house loan now during the Christmas Holidays. All while I'm going through this stressful time in my life. Or General Anxiety Disorder. It doesn't make sense to me, but then he is why I'm having these issues.

Paislee,

I'm sorry you're having all this stress. Although, it sounds like it is a relief to not have gotten the refinancing.

Itis hard to feel okay when it feels like loved ones aren't listening. Maybe the best thing is to state how you feel and then say soemthing like, "I really hope you understand this." This is easier said than done, and I don't know if this helps.

Remember to be kind to yourself. Anything financial related can be really draining. Do something nice for yourself.