Feeling down

Inside Man · Post by **Inside Man** » Thu May 22, 2008 1:49 pm

Hello everyone,
Yesterday I went to the doctor with a friend of mine. We have been friends for over 20 years. He is deaf but can read lips. He found out about a year ago that he has colon cancer and spots on his liver and lungs. He has been going to the hospital for chemo treatments. Then they gave him a break. The chemo did shrink the spots but they are trying to grow again. His Mom couldn't go with him so I did to translate between him and the doctor. My friend ask me to ask the doctor how long he could go for. I asked and I was having some anxiety...who wouldn't? The doctor said a person with this type of cancer typically has a life span of 2 1/2 to 3 years. Before when they didn't have chemo, they would live for 90 days. The doctor told my friend that he needed to know this and be aware of this. The doctor does not want him to focus too much on the future. He wants him to focus on now. Now try to translate that (anxiety). But I did. I also told him that the doctor really doesn't know how long, he's talking typically. I told him to take each day as it comes, deal with just that day. I really couldn't find the words. I hope what I did say helped. He seemed in good spirits when he left. I'm on Session 9 Get Off the Guilt and Worry Treadmill. Talk about learning a life lesson.

All best to everyone on here,
Inside Man

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu May 22, 2008 2:30 pm

Just goes to prove no matter how bad we think we have it there is someone out there a lot worse off and we should be thankful for each and every day we are blessed with.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your friend. I hope he lives each day happily and to the fullest and I pray you can remain strong for his sake as well as your own.

Carolyn Dickman · Post by **Carolyn Dickman** » Thu May 22, 2008 3:44 pm

Hang in there Inside Man, you did what you had to do. Remember to look after yourself as well as your friend. My thoughts are with you and I wish you strength to see this through. I hope you find some comfort in others who care.

Boon · Post by **Boon** » Thu May 22, 2008 3:51 pm

Hang in there Inside Man. You did what you had to. Remember to look after yourself as well as your friend. I hope this program and the people on it will help you get through this. My thoughts are with you. Please continue to post your worries. I'm sure there's alot of people out there that can help you feel not alone with this. Take Care

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu May 22, 2008 3:55 pm

Sorry for the double post. My computer is running slow this evening and I thought the first one didn't go through!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Fri May 23, 2008 3:30 pm

Hello Wireman,
Thanks for your prayers and words. I appreciate it. It's hard for him to hear from the doctor I'm sure. It was hard for me to translate it to him. But I guess if you are a true friend, you're there during the good times and the bad.

All my best,
Inside Man

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Fri May 23, 2008 3:34 pm

Hello Freckles,
I'm ok. It was just an uncomfortable thing to deal with for me. He's known my family for years, all of us, my mom, wife, daughter, brother, and sisters. He's a friend of the family, you know, like a family member.

All my best,
Inside Man

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Fri May 23, 2008 3:50 pm

Hello Inside Man,
Sounds like you are a very good friend and I'm sure that your words and support were both appreciated and comforting at this difficult time.It seems to me that the more we care about others the less time we have to worry and fret --thats a good thing!!TAKE CARE

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat May 24, 2008 8:10 am

Choose To Be Free

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If you think of yourself as a victim, stop that thought right now. Nothing positive will come of it. No matter what has brought you to where you are, it is up to you to move yourself forward. Have forces beyond your control injured you or held you back? Of course they have.

Do you really want to depend on those same forces to move you forward?

Though others may be to blame for your situation, you are nonetheless responsible for it. Though you may have many excellent reasons to feel sorry for yourself, such pity will not add anything of value to your life...

If see yourself as a victim, it is because you have chosen to do so. Does that sound harsh and uncaring? Then keep this in mind. There are many who have suffered even more than you, who have chosen not to be a victim, who have chosen instead to live life on their own terms...

You can choose to be responsible and by so doing you can choose to be free...

-- Ralph Marston
Posted by: LINELLA BRECKENRIDGE

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun May 25, 2008 2:17 am

Hello Annette,
I understand. I'm responsible for myself, my reactions, and my responses to things. I handled the situation and I'm glad I could be there for him because that's what a friend is for. I appreciate you posting and I do understand what you're saying here. Thank you.

All my best,
Inside Man

P.S. I've also read a lot of Ralph Marston on the daily motivator.