Posted: Wed Oct 15, 2008 2:51 am
Hello everyone. I am in need of prayer for healing for my soul and deliverance from some things that are hindering me from being the best that I know I can be. First of all my people skills aren't that great. Whenever there is someone talking about me, whether its positive or negative criticism, I easily get defensive. I also have a habit of running into a shell that i try so hard to break out of. Another problem that I have is just letting people in. I feel like its hard to just let people in when they are judging me from the outside. So that's why I don't. If it were up to me, I would stay in a shell, wouldn't care if any one talk to me or not. But I can't live like this. I also have a big problem with worry. Whenever I worry about something, the situation comes out to be a positive situation, but when I don't worry about it, the situation turns out to be negative. I can't stand living safe anymore. I'm tired of people judging me. I am currently in the process of trying to build my faith and my confidence in the Lord, but it seems as if he is so far away from me and I easily get discouraged and speak negatively aganst myself. Sometimes I always find myself repeating "Nobody cares about me". When I say this I even mean God.
I feel like I am all alone and with no one to talk to sometimes. When I want to talk to God, I feel like I'm just talking to myself. So many people have hurt me, from family, so called friends, people on the job and so on. I am dealing with letting those past hurts go and trying to move on with forgiveness in my heart. But its still there.
I'm not going to act like I'm some saint either. I have made my mistakes and hope those people will forgive me for the wrong that I have done and I hope that God will just have mercy on me and those people.
I feel like my family members are just using me for money and some friends just using me to get material things.
Whenever I'm really stressed out, my chest gets really tight, and my left side starts to hurt really bad and I totally lose my appetite. I'm sick of my body weight going up and down and I know its because of stress.
I'm also dealing with my job. Like I said I don't like speaking against myself, but this is what I have come to know. I don't like my job and I'm not that great at it. I just want to believe that there is something out there for me that I can really show my talent in and be able to be paid for it. I'm not sure if I have a problem with coming under authority, but If I do I want to recognize the problem and correct it. I know this is not going to happen overnight and I need to have patience. But please, please pray and be in aggreement with me that I can be delivered from this bondage that I feel like I am stuck in. If you know some bible references that I can use, I really would appreciate it. Thank You for listening.
I feel like I am all alone and with no one to talk to sometimes. When I want to talk to God, I feel like I'm just talking to myself. So many people have hurt me, from family, so called friends, people on the job and so on. I am dealing with letting those past hurts go and trying to move on with forgiveness in my heart. But its still there.
I'm not going to act like I'm some saint either. I have made my mistakes and hope those people will forgive me for the wrong that I have done and I hope that God will just have mercy on me and those people.
I feel like my family members are just using me for money and some friends just using me to get material things.
Whenever I'm really stressed out, my chest gets really tight, and my left side starts to hurt really bad and I totally lose my appetite. I'm sick of my body weight going up and down and I know its because of stress.
I'm also dealing with my job. Like I said I don't like speaking against myself, but this is what I have come to know. I don't like my job and I'm not that great at it. I just want to believe that there is something out there for me that I can really show my talent in and be able to be paid for it. I'm not sure if I have a problem with coming under authority, but If I do I want to recognize the problem and correct it. I know this is not going to happen overnight and I need to have patience. But please, please pray and be in aggreement with me that I can be delivered from this bondage that I feel like I am stuck in. If you know some bible references that I can use, I really would appreciate it. Thank You for listening.