Stress Center Peer Support

I am not a member of the church, but I grew up believing in those ways, and it's all still very much apart of my daily life. The reason why I ask if there is anyone out there with the same beliefs, is because there really aren't that many of us, and if you are one of these people, then you know what I'm talking about. I wish that I could talk to my husband, but he kind of shies away from Bible talk. He's a great person, but he hasn't really been raised with any beliefs. I guess I'll just get to the point...I really think that a major part of my anxiety/depression is religious based. I feel so guilty for even saying that, but I need to get it out. I pray daily that the Lord will heal me of this terrible "thing", and He has helped me in so many ways I can't even count, from very tiny daily things to helping me get through the death of my dad 2 years ago. I have good days and bad days, I'm sure many people experience that.

I did start going to church about a year and a half ago, but my husband and I got pregnant, and I guess I started making excuses not to go. My baby is 5 months old now, and I really thought that when I gave birth that my anxiety/depression would go away, because I would have something else to put my mind on. Well, it went away for the first couple of months, and now that we are on more of a schedule, I find myself going back to frightening thoughts. It's like I'm bored or something, and have to find things to worry about. If anyone knows this it's me...to let Jesus take your problems, give Him your worries, pray, just live the best life you can, and take one day at a time. But it's weird, I can't seem to take my own advice. I should go back to church, to talk to the very kind people there about my worries. But, I'm actually afraid that maybe they might not understand, I would rather talk to someone NOT face-to-face, I guess because I'm embarassed by what I've allowed to enter my mind. I do feel like this has happened to me for a reason, or reasons. Probably for one, to make me stronger, I can't figure out the rest of it though.

For anyone who reads this and is wondering what in the world are my beliefs anyway?, I'll try to put it in a nutshell. I don't celebrate Christmas, Easter, or Halloween. I try my best to observe God's Holy Days...Feast of Tabernacles, Days of Unleavened Bread, things like that. I believe that Saturday is the Sabbath and not Sunday. I believe in keeping the 10 Commandments, all of them! And there are many, many other things that I believe that are different from most of the people I know. Believe it or not, I used to be "normal" though, my family did celebrate all of the "normal" holidays until I was about 10 years old. I am not a "goody-goody". I have the occasional alcoholic beverage, and I may say a dirty word once in a while. So, I want to say that I do not think that anyone who does celebrate those holidays are wrong, religious stuff is SO CONFUSING, and in so many ways, scary too. However, I am very proud of who I am, and very thankful that I do believe the way that I do. Being a good Christain is pretty hard work if you think about it, there are constantly evil things pulling you toward them.

I feel that I need someone to talk to though, to see if there is anyone out there that might feel the same way I do. My mom and I are extremely close, and I also have a brother that I am very close to, but I guess I don't want them to think I'm crazy either. It's pretty strange to have all these people around, but still feel so lonely, I don't understand it. So, I hope that I don't scare anyone away, I hope that there is someone (or people) that are called to answer this message. I have been putting off writing this message for so long, and for some reason I think now is the time for me to get some courage to ask for help. I welcome any advice, even if you don't believe the way that I do. I know I didn't elaborate on the scary thoughts that I have, I guess I'm just waiting on someone to respond first and then go from there. I do appreciate your time, for those of you who read this, and God Bless you all.

Having strong beliefs in God are good and actually ccan help heal if you work into the program as developped by the Stress Center. You may consider acquiring the book or CD by Norman Vincent Peale : "The Power of Positive thinking". He takes a Christian approach to thought making and self-reconditionning of the mind. I am not Christian but I read him and listen to his CD as much as I follow Lucinda's program to the T. Have the courage to talk to a close family person just as Lucinda suggests it. There is no harm in it. You can educate them too to understand your condition which is not being crazy but simply stress or anxiety that we all experience from time to time. Hung in there; you'll overcome it. Check out the book at the library. It's vvery good! You might call the "Call Center" for the Stress Center to seek direct personal help. Their phone number should be in one of the books.

Mistee, I don't know if this helps. I'm a Messianic Jew for over 17 years now, and was raised in a Conservative Jewish home, we did celebrate Halloween, but of course no Christmas or Easter.

When I came to believe in the Messiah, it took a very long time for me to be comfortable looking at crosses and saying the name Jesus as I was raised to be hateful toward anything Christian.

Christmas and Easter, It's just a way I think of being "Americanized" and going with American church culture. I think how you were brought up was honoring the Bible and I can't see it being wrong to celebrate anything outside of that as long as you are not doing something against God, but I do understand the comfort level. Ha, I still get wigged out when my family eats pork or brings a pepperoni pizza into the house. Even when they make turkey or beef bacon on the cookware it makes me ill.

Feel free to send me a private message if you ever want to chat about this, we aren't in the same exact boat but I think we can relate.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Mistee:
"I am not a member of the church, but I grew up believing in those ways, and it's all still very much apart of my daily life.... I guess I'll just get to the point...I really think that a major part of my anxiety/depression is religious based."


Hi Mistee,
I am not doing very well at the moment to reply to the various things that you mentioned. In light of the fact that there are a lot of people that grow up believing in a lot of different things, including those who profess to be Christians. I would like to pose a question that we could all ask ourselves--"Do I believe in doctrines (teachiings) because my family and others say so, or do I actually, in a prayful manner, study the Scriptures for myself knowing that I am under the influence of the Holy Spirit"? Jesus promised, "When he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth."--Jn 16:13. Paul says, "Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth."--2 Ti 2:15. In other words we need to study all the fullness of what the Bible is saying on any given topic. "For precept must be upon precept, precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little."--Is 28:10. Of course, there is a difference in just knowing the Word of God and being obedient to it. "Be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves."--James 1:22. Jesus said, in speaking of the Father, "If any man will do his will, he shall know of the doctrine, whether it be of God, or whether I speak of myself. Without the love of God, however, everything we say, know, or do is all in vain. (See 1 Cor 13, the "love chapter"). I remember a time when, as an agnostic drunk sitting on a bar stool, I was contemplating the question of what the greatest power or force in the world was. What has the ability to overcome all things? I thought about things like people, nations, military strength, etc., but it seemed like there had to be something more than the ugly power struggle of this world. Without being able to put my thumb on a definition of love, I somehow knew that love had to be the greatest thing there is. After I came to know God and started to read the Bible, I was amazed to discover that the Bible actually says, "God is love." What a revelation that was for me! Love truly overcomes all things. Jesus, who is love, overcame the world. The first chapter of John also says, "The Word was God".... "And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us." To know the Scriptures is to know the one true God. "And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.--Jn 17:3.

If we are not continually feeding on the Word of God we are going to be malnurished, spiritually speaking, and we can leave ourselves wide open to all kinds of negative and toxic thinking that can lead to things like anxiety and depression, not to mention fear. Speaking of fear, 1 John 4:18 says, "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love." This text not only points out the power of God's love to cast out fear, but it can make us aware of how our relationship with God is doing when we see that love and fear do not go together. "God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in HIm."--1Jn 4:16.

I know for myself that the answer is staying dead to self and and being alive in Christ Jesus. Living to please God and giving glory to Him should be the way of life for the Christian.

Please note that I'm just sharing some "food for thought" and not trying to say what is true or not true about what you believe.

God bless you as you continue your journey with Him.

P.S. I could comment at a later time, if you would like, about the things that you mentioned you believed.