Posted: Wed Mar 19, 2008 4:08 am
Hey everyone! Just wanted to say I am feeling a lot better then I was last week. I have noticed though that I have been worrying a lot, I am trying my best to pray instead. I like the saying. If you are going to worry don't pray ands if you pray don't worry. Its like my mind just wants to dwell on negative things I have no control over. But that is how the enemy works eh? He puts a thought in our head and then we may or hopefully may not run with it. What has been extremely benificial to me is talking, talking about what is inside, now I know its not rocket science but I was one to keep everythin g in. I mean everything. Al the years of surpressing is bound to build up lot of anxiety. I have been doing a lot of talking in a recovery group I'm going to. It is called celebrating recovery and is based on the 12 steps in comparison to biblical truths. It is amazing. I am getting so much out that neded for so long to come out. I know I just have to put my complete trust in God and it will be a proess because of my trust issues but it will happen if I keep working at it. I just want Gods will and to stop trying to control evertthing because Im realizing that my controling and running from things is only coming back to bite me. I no God wants to deal with my insecurities at this time, it is extremely painful to look at myself and to see the damage I created by my own actions but in order to be free It has to come to the light.