What Are YOUR "What-ifs?"

Jod · Post by **Jod** » Wed Dec 27, 2006 6:15 am

I have just ordered the package - haven't received it yet. I have been dealing w/ this for 3 years now. I am a mother of 2 (4 & 8), wife of 12 years and a community leader. Until I can start the program, please tell me how I can get these what if thoughts out of my head. Every morning they start all over. Some days are worse than others. But I must keep going w/ my day. So many people rely on me. PLEASE give me some ideas to help get through this.
My biggest what if is what if I die...and no one is around...my husband can not raise my kiddo's on his own...who will help???

cindylou · Post by **cindylou** » Wed Jan 03, 2007 8:41 am

Hey Jod! I WAS where you are now for over thirty years, including the daily fear of dying and not being there for my kids. That was my big one too.I'm still here,but without the panic attacks and extreme anxiety, and my babies are in college now and I intend to stick around for a while.
What if I stop worrying about dying and just learn to live in the present and enjoy life more? Start now by telling yourself every day that it's just a thought. Smile .
What if some of the people who rely on me started helping me with the load of responsibility? Have you been able to ask for help? This was hard for me to do because I am a perfectionist and thought only I could or should do it all.
What if I start the program the day I get it and it starts working right away, even if just a bit?
What if my thoughts can't control me forever and there is a solution to my situation that will be here in my mail very soon because I had the guts and intelligence to order it?
What if I just go hug my kids right now and feel good just knowing that I can do that?
What if my day gets better just for a moment, but it's a good one? Doesn't that hug feel good?
What if I'm actually pretty healthy and will be there for my kids for many years to come no matter what I'm thinking now?

ginger07 · Post by **ginger07** » Wed May 02, 2007 4:20 am

This entire "what if" thread has made cry. I can relate. I have soo many what if's !!For awhile in my life, actually many years I didn't let thing bother me and I always comforted others with their fears. Now the anxiety is on me!!

My what Ifs-

what if I never get over this anxiety

what if something happens to my children

what if something happens to my husband

what if something happens to my parents or my brother

what if I have a brain tumor

what if die and I'm not here for my family

what if my kids find out their father isn't their biological dad

what if I get on a plane and it crashes

what if my husband cheats on me

what if my anxiety is making my husband unhappy

what if my friends or someone I love gets AIDS

what if I'm really a nut!!

I could go on and on!!

Good what ifs-

What if I overcome this and life is a much happier place

what if I get to grow old and spoil my grandkids

what if I take that plane and it doesn't crash (I'd get to see Hawaii)

What if I feel less anxious

what if I see the glass always half full instead of half empty

what if I never take anxiety meds again!! They seem to only cover up the real issues and whats the anxiety.

What if I can be relaxed again!!!

What if I can feel less overwhelmed

what if I can under react !!

what if when I was told I had pre- cervical cancer I didn't over react

what if when I hurt my back and took flexeral and had a bad drug reaction I saw it as a Bad reaction instead of over reacting and thinking that I should have been able to control the reaction I had to this drug!!

What if I didn't let the anxiety take over and I enjoyed the cruise I went on with my family!!

GardenFairy · Post by **GardenFairy** » Thu May 03, 2007 10:10 pm

Oh, I love his board!

My "what ifs" have already been posted here by others...
- what if I loose my sanity, can´t go on working, loose my job, can´t pay my bills, can´t pay my debts, can´t take care of my daughter and my pets???

- what if I hurt myself or someone else? or someone I love?
- what if I say something stupid or embarassing during a meeting?
- what if I get cancer like my Mum?
- what if I get blind?
- what if something terrible happens to my daughter?
- what if I geth the panic attack that never goes away?
-what if I never ever get rid of migraine?

... to be continued...

AnnetteW · Post by **AnnetteW** » Wed Jun 06, 2007 10:56 am

First off, thank you Mello Nello. I love your what if list. We need more of this.

I must confess, I am having somewhat of a hard week this week also. I was so excited yesterday. I was able to accomplish so much more than I had in the past. I was able to do arrands alone that I haven't been able to do for so long. Then last night, I was totally washed out----and IBS to boot. Today, is still the same. I have had to take Zanax and still the symptoms.

I was hoping to be incuragement, but I am weak today.

AnnetteW · Post by **AnnetteW** » Wed Jun 06, 2007 3:54 pm

I copied this from someone else, but I sure like it.

What if... you have a wonderful day?
What if... you have NO symptoms today?
What if... you face a fear a nothing happens?
What if... you smile all day long?
What if...You dont give anxiety a second thought ever again?
What if...You realize the dream you have been dreaming for years?
What if... You put a smile on someone elses face today?
What if...You are calm and relaxed from this point on?
What if.. You realize that all your negative What ifs are just that, NEGATIVE!!!!

AnnetteW · Post by **AnnetteW** » Fri Jun 08, 2007 4:38 am

Thank you Mello Nello for the positive what ifs
I hing to them.

Made a copy to carry with me.

have a blessed day

Meadowlark · Post by **Meadowlark** » Thu Jun 21, 2007 3:04 pm

I always thought that I was being proactive by planning ahead for the worst case scenerio, sorta like arranging furniture in a room that does not exist. I read all these forum responses and find myself amazed at how I relate!

GE · Post by GE » Mon Jul 23, 2007 4:39 am

ok here goes...
What if...I never get over this anxiety
What if...I jump off the hotel balcony
What if...I hurt myself or someone I love
What if...these thoughts stop scaring me and I actully like them (AH!) (OK EVEN TYPING THAT I had an attack)
What if...I kill myself-my poor family what will they do? (another attack) ok I gotta quit.

"Lord show me the way and I will go"

chloe9 · Post by **chloe9** » Mon Jul 23, 2007 5:06 am

i agree with everyone else - this topic rocks! i had to laugh reading over the other what-ifs... not because they're funny (though some may be), but because it's so nice to see that my "what if no one else thinks these things..." isn't true.

here goes:

what if i jump? (off a building/balcony/etc)
what if i have nightmares again?
what if i see the someone that hurt me?
what if someone i love dies? my cats?
what if i'm alone?
what if i don't get into a good phD program?
what if i cause my family to lose everything?
what if i disappoint family/friends and don't finish what i started?
what if i'm never taken seriously?
what if i shouldn't be taken seriously, and i'm the only one who doesn't know it? how embaressing!
what if i never get rid of my double chin? what about my profile?!

what if people think i wrote too much on this forum post?