Posted: Sat Nov 14, 2009 9:06 am
i am 30 years old and i have never had a boyfriend. i am black my family is white and i went to a school with a total of 5 or 6 other black people. i am attracted to white guys, but my brother and alot of people that went to my school would always say that it was discusting to be in that type of relationship. so all my life i have always thought that something was wrong with me that i wasnt worthy of someone liking me because of the color of my skin. i dont think that im an ugly person, i get alot of compliments that im pretty but anytime that i like someone or they find out that i have feelings for them its a big problem for me. im scared that im gonna try and im gonna get hurt cause i have been hurt so many times, i just dont know how to be me around someone i care about. i tried to tell a guy who i thought was my friend how i felt and he told me he didnt want to talk to me about it. i tried to give him space and we hung out a few times after that and it was complicated. i told him i couldnt be friends anymore and he said we were never friends in the first place. so now i just am to afraid to try to even get close to a guy even as friends. does anyone else have a similar problem like this