Is this OCD?

[suziegreenberg]

I have a crippling fear of starting new jobs. Usually I interview ok but as soon as the position starts, my mind shuts off and I can't understand instruction. When I have to learn something new or even make a photocopy of something for example, my mind goes blank and I cannot complete the task. I have been fired from a few jobs just within the first few days. It is extremely embarrassing. I can't even support myself financially because of this. The worst part is, the more I try to focus on what is being told to me, the more I get distracted from what is happening by telling myself to focus. I just want to have a normal life and take care of myself but the second I step into an office or any work environment and am asked to learn new things and complete simple tasks like learning new software, I panic. Every shrink I have seen has been unable to help me. They have never seen anything like this before,Is this a compulsive disorder or something else? Any thoughts that could help?

[NeverQuit]

I am similar, very bad at listening to directions, especially if I am anxious and have obsessive thoughts going through my head. When we anticipate something going negatively, it is often much harder to concentrate.

It definitely sounds like it could be anxiety, is it only in these work situations? Do you experience any body symptoms when this happens, like racing heart, racing thoughts, etc.? Maybe you are so anxious about possibly not performing well on the job that you over-think it and distract yourself from the job at hand.

Maybe you could take notes as the person is instructing you? Have you tried doing that?

Do you drink a lot of caffiene? If you're used to doing that, try eliminating all caffiene for a while and see how you feel.

[suziegreenberg]

thank you for responding. i do have body symptoms. I sweat, my heart races and all noises around me are muffled like the parents in the charlie brown cartoons. i'm on session three and am going to start incorporating more positive thinking into my life. i just don't know how to focus on what is going on whithout focusing on focusing which leads me to not pay attention to what is being said. and yes, it is an irrational fear of not completing the task correctly. it comes from a childhood of being told i wasn't competent enough to do certain things and being yelled at when i did try and it wasn't good enough.