Obsessing about obsessing

Twisted Noodle · Post by **Twisted Noodle** » Fri Aug 21, 2009 5:40 am

I have suffered from anxiety and OCD for a while now. I have been on Prozac 10 mg for about three months and has really hepled me get better. I still suffer from Obsessive scary thoughts sometimes. Not as bad as I used to. Is it normal to still have obsessive scary thoughts sometimes even though I am on meds? I am so much better than I was three months ago. I thought for sure I was going crazy and scared to be alone with my daughter. I am a loving mom and wife but have no patience at all. I also get very bad PMS the week before my cycle and sometimes feel sad about anxious. Anyone had similarities as me??/ Thanks.

scaredviolet · Post by **scaredviolet** » Fri Aug 21, 2009 7:45 am

I have a similar story, when this first started I would have scary thoughts about my kids, but was somehow able to get rid of them,or realized that it's mind-garbage, and really was my OCD/anxiety and they weren't true. Now I have relapses of anxiety/worry/hopelessness and my scary thoughts are "if I don't get better, what if I commit suicide". It will put me in a full blown panic attack with racing thoughts. Just typing this feels irrational, but that's what happens in my mind. I am alone a lot because my husband and family are always working so all I do is chase my thoughts around all day long. Sometimes I can feel good, sometimes I feel desperately bad. The program has helped, I am beginning session 3, which will be hard considering all this is negative self talk. I keep telling myself, I am devoted to my recovery and to my children. I too have started an SSRI (zoloft) for this, how long until you felt a difference? I've been on it 9 days, at a slow taper (12.5-25) because I am sensitive to side effects. Please keep in touch if you need to talk, I need it too.

Gottagetbetter · Post by **Gottagetbetter** » Fri Aug 21, 2009 8:42 am

I am in the smae boat as you Twisted Noodle, I am on 20mg's of Lexapro and it has helped a lot! But there are still days when I am plagued by these "SCARY, IRRATIONAL, STUPID, THOUGHTS" the week before my period is the absolute worst. I can obsess about my thoughts all day long. I have awful intrusive thoughts about harming mmy family or myself (these are my worst fears). I "what if" about all of the scarey things that could happen to me and my family. I hope to one day with the help of the Lord God Almighty, to conquer and persevere over this OCD. I just want to look forward to the future. Not be so scared of it!

Erica

teasha · Post by **teasha** » Fri Aug 21, 2009 11:22 am

Hi there! I am also in the same boat! I have had the thoughts of harming my kids but now its gone to totally crazy thoughts. One after another after another!!! Then it goes to obsessing that i will never be the same again and i am crazy etc!!! So much to where i almost went to the psych ward...never been and hopefully never will!! What the hugest problem is now is my husband is running from me. He doesnt get it nor has he tried to inquire. He is on the verge of divorce and i used to drink to cope with my thoughts but then the next day is 100X worse! So im tying to quit that and fix myself and he has nooo compasion at all! I need kind words and support of any kind. I need to quit obsessing on anxiety and be defined by my problems! I feel as if im pushing all of my friends and family away due to always having a PROBLEM. Do ya feel me peeps??? Please respond! or email me at foxxy279@yahoo.com.
Love and peace of mind to all

mack · Post by **mack** » Sun Aug 23, 2009 5:25 pm

I'm there with all of ya. The thoughts can be so absurd and annoying. I'm struggling with a new one right now that has me shaking in my boots. Doesn't really matter what the thought is though I've found, but I've let this one grab ahold and it's grasp is tight. Working on letting go and accepting these thoughts as just thoughts is a bitch, but so many who have struggled as we have say that this is the way. As far as the anti depressants it usually takes 6 to 8 weeks before any positive effects can be noticed, but these meds are designed to work along side with therapy, usually cognitive behavior therapy. There is no magic pill that's going to cure you. They are just there to aid you so you can function through your therapy. Teasha I know what you mean about pushing the people you love away. My mom has told me how my sister gets depressed whenever she talks to me. That one hurt. Luckily I have an amazing support system but in reality they cant understand what it's like. Thats why I come on this forum. Great advice here too. I'm truly sorry your husband isn't coming through for you, but you must demand what you need. He made a commitment to you and it's not just for when things are going well. You deserve to find happiness and peace and I truly hope you do. I'm always here to listen. You are never truly alone you just sometimes have to look a little harder for the companionship you deserve. Just know that you are not going to go crazy. You are scaring the crap out of yourself, believe me I do the same thing, and you need to learn the ways to calm yourself down and talk to yourself lovingly and logically. I know you've probably heard all this before and I struggle to do these things myself, but the more I commit to overcoming this and finding all the info I can on it the more I feel I can handle it. I will be thinking about you and send you all the Peace I can muster. Keep your head up and demand what you need.