I seem to have an easier time being assertive with other females but when I try to be assertive with my son or husband I seem to have to raise my voice to be heard .
I can get my point accorss point blank to my daughter w/o raising my voice at all .
Anyone else come across this & have suggestions ?
Do you think this is more of a respect thing ?
question - gender assertiveness
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Guest
Hi LynnG,
I think that is normal. I am a guy, and I think by nature, we are just not as smart as girls. Sometimes, particularly when our minds wonder, we can't seem to multi-task either, we do need something that catches our attention, and someone else speaking loud might just help us to focus our little wondering minds. No offense guys. I know my wife thinks I never listen to her. She she may or not realize is that if she gets lovey with me, she has my full attention
Lynn, if it makes you nervous or upsets you that you have to raise your voice, try the opposite. Get their attention, say by giving them a hug or kiss and then making eye to contact before you speak. Sounds like a lot to go through, but what's the harm? They'll wonder what is that about? and then you let them have it. viola! you got their attention!
My wife says I am wrong about this, she says that it is that old men are from Mars Women are from Venus thing. That might explain the why, but I am giving you a guys point of view, and what I think you may need to do about it. I think I am right about this.
I think that is normal. I am a guy, and I think by nature, we are just not as smart as girls. Sometimes, particularly when our minds wonder, we can't seem to multi-task either, we do need something that catches our attention, and someone else speaking loud might just help us to focus our little wondering minds. No offense guys. I know my wife thinks I never listen to her. She she may or not realize is that if she gets lovey with me, she has my full attention
Lynn, if it makes you nervous or upsets you that you have to raise your voice, try the opposite. Get their attention, say by giving them a hug or kiss and then making eye to contact before you speak. Sounds like a lot to go through, but what's the harm? They'll wonder what is that about? and then you let them have it. viola! you got their attention!
My wife says I am wrong about this, she says that it is that old men are from Mars Women are from Venus thing. That might explain the why, but I am giving you a guys point of view, and what I think you may need to do about it. I think I am right about this.
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Guest
Thanks I guess I will try not worry so much about raising my voice . I just hate the way my body feels when I do because I can feel myself getting upset & angry about it at that point.
As far as snuggling or kissing them to get their attention - that I need to think about -it is unsettled w/ me right now. I feel like I would be allowing them to walk on me .. giving them affection for not listening to me . Not sure on that one .
Thanks for the guys opinion on it though !!
As far as snuggling or kissing them to get their attention - that I need to think about -it is unsettled w/ me right now. I feel like I would be allowing them to walk on me .. giving them affection for not listening to me . Not sure on that one .
Thanks for the guys opinion on it though !!