Stress Center Peer Support

I don't have a strong relationship with my son and his wife. It is almost nonexistant. I have been invited to a birthday party for a 6 yr. old step great grandson that I only see on his birthday and on Christmas. I feel as though they are taking advantage of me and I would like to tell them that I don't feel obligated to give him a gift when I never see him or have any knowledge of what he likes. My friend has warned me to think of what the reprocusions could be if I do this. I feel like I have to go or there will be big trouble from my daughter-in-law and my son. What do others think?

I'm thinking that you as the Grandmother and older person, that you should go to the Birthday party, take a gift card and put some money in it if you want. Giving...always helps...whether you want to or they deserve it. The 6 year old is innocent in this and you can be an example and maybe start a relationship. You also might want to have an escape plan if things don't go well.
Good Luck and tell us how it went. Paislee

It sounds as though you may feel some hurt about these relationships. I would certainly go to the party and bring your grandchild a gift. If you can put aside any past hurts or ill feelings, that would be best. If I were in your situation, I would just try to be loving, kind and forgiving. I try to always take that approach with people I feel conflicted about because I know it will leave me feeling better about myself and with no regrets. Best wishes... jkulag

I went to the party and took a card with money for a college fund my son was starting for his step grand child. It was an arcade with all sorts of games and I had a great time! I played air hockey with my son and enjoyed getting as many tickets as I could for the birthday boy. Thanks, you were very right. I needed an "attitude adjustment".

Bravo !! What a great story to hear. I'm impressed with your courage and generosity. Thanks so much for telling us how it all worked out. Take care...jkulag

That's super! Glad to hear it! Yippee! Paislee