Posted: Sat Nov 13, 2010 7:26 am
I have realized that one of my biggest problems is with being assertive. And when I first started all of this I didn't even see how being assertive or not had anything to do with anxiety. But WOW has that changed. I realized so much how much I lack assertiveness. More so with certain people.
I've learned that I have a really hard time being assertive with my best friend. Any time any sort of conflict arises, I feel extreme anxiety, catastrophizing everything on the inside, and totally freaking out.
I have always been very passive, especially with her and I think...no now I know a lot of it is because 1. I'm a passive person-I hate conflict and will avoid it at all costs, and 2. she can be aggressive when she is upset about something. So those two = a deadly combination for me lol.
I've been trying to be more assertive with everything, and lately I have been feeling some situations where I could be more assertive with her, but am finding that I have a really hard time with it.
I've also noticed a lot of resentful feelings I have toward her that stem from her upsetting me about things in the past, and never saying anything about it because I just wanted to 'keep the peace' or what I felt was wrong in some sense, etc. etc. etc.
I just don't know how to get past it all.
I know that the more I practice being assertive with her, the more comfortable I will become with it, but AAAHHHHHH it's really hard.
Does anybody else feel like this with certain people who are very important to them?
I mean she's my best friend and I love her to death and don't know what I would do if we ever weren't friends.
I'm just having a hard time getting through this assertive stuff especially with her.
And WOW I've had this program for a while and always listened to it without really practicing or applying what everyone was saying, but once I finally did I can't believe how much it really works.
I have been experiencing peace of mind, calmness, depression lifting, and oh my does it feel good.
I've learned that I have a really hard time being assertive with my best friend. Any time any sort of conflict arises, I feel extreme anxiety, catastrophizing everything on the inside, and totally freaking out.
I have always been very passive, especially with her and I think...no now I know a lot of it is because 1. I'm a passive person-I hate conflict and will avoid it at all costs, and 2. she can be aggressive when she is upset about something. So those two = a deadly combination for me lol.
I've been trying to be more assertive with everything, and lately I have been feeling some situations where I could be more assertive with her, but am finding that I have a really hard time with it.
I've also noticed a lot of resentful feelings I have toward her that stem from her upsetting me about things in the past, and never saying anything about it because I just wanted to 'keep the peace' or what I felt was wrong in some sense, etc. etc. etc.
I just don't know how to get past it all.
I know that the more I practice being assertive with her, the more comfortable I will become with it, but AAAHHHHHH it's really hard.
Does anybody else feel like this with certain people who are very important to them?
I mean she's my best friend and I love her to death and don't know what I would do if we ever weren't friends.
I'm just having a hard time getting through this assertive stuff especially with her.
And WOW I've had this program for a while and always listened to it without really practicing or applying what everyone was saying, but once I finally did I can't believe how much it really works.
I have been experiencing peace of mind, calmness, depression lifting, and oh my does it feel good.