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Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Jan 01, 2008 10:56 am

Well its tough when things are said behind your back, because then you sound like you are accusing somebody. If you hear someone say it, I would be polite but forceful. People have a stereotype in their mind that homosexuals are weak or submissive. If you show them that you can stand up for yourself that will make them think twice. Also if your coworkers dont know you well, I would try to try to be friendly and let them see your just a normal person like everyone else.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Tue Jan 01, 2008 4:46 pm

This is a tough situation.

I have not been in that particular situation, but I have confronted those types of people that have ridiculed other people in my presence that were afraid to speak up. I have taken them aside and asked them if they felt better about themselves? Did saying that make them a better, bigger person? Why did they feel it necessary to say the things they did?

I would not go on speculation, that is did someone really say something about you. If you heard it call them on the carpet in a professional, respectful BUT I do mean business manner.

Sometimes our biggest fears need to be faced head on otherwise we will just keep cowering from others and life. Keep it professional and polite as not to get yourself in hot water. Show them that you will not tolerate their crap. You are NOT the office joke! You are a human!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 7:56 am

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 9:24 am

What they are doing is not only wrong...it's illegal. They are not allowed to harrass you about your sexual orientation. Even if they try to disguise it as being a joke. This is taken very seriously in the workplace today and there can be serious consequences for any company that turns a blind eye to this kind of behaviour. Here is my thoughts on how to approach the situation. Maybe first write down the main things you want to say to your boss. You want to approach him in a professional way. You should then maybe give some examples of things you heard being said. Let him know that it is his job to correct this behaviour. If need be remind him that this behaviour is illegal and is creating a hostile work place and then leave it to him to correct the situation. One thing I know is even if you are completely freaking out on the inside noone else can see it. Just remember that you are justified in asking that this behaviour be stopped. You have rights.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 6:13 pm

Hi I am gay and I have had that problem in my life too, is quite common when you are in the closet or halfway... I have come to the terms that has to do with your self-acceptance. This last couple of weeks I am coming out the closet straight forward to everybody because I was tired of all that behind your back thing in different situations and for my surprise I have so many friends that I am being very supportive!!! yes I have a couple of weird people but the fact that I am being open to so many at the same time is playing an important role because The accepting ones are making it up for the judgful ones, is going to help you to don't get caught up on negative people, believe me once you start ignoring them they are going to have to adjust, either get away from you or change their behavior toward you...........If you want my opinion is liberating, I even have friends trying to hook me up now

That's funny, I never thought of that!
Good Luck
liz

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 5:17 am

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 5:22 am

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:05 pm

Binding your time is not coward

and believe me I know where you are coming from, I have had that feelings before, but the main thing is that is hurting your "self-esteem" in the process and that is way more important than the conservative people. Whatever you decide to do I support you, but what is important is that you know You are a person worthy of respect, compassion, love.
Check this video out <A HREF="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XEkYlEXb ... re=related" TARGET=_blank>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XEkYlEXb ... related</A>

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:14 pm

The video is her stand up comedy right after she was cruely critiziced for all the Hollywood Enterprise and the media for coming out.... She would make you laugh :0) Humor can heal!