The Guilt of Unhappiness

Anyone suffering from depression may post their history, experience, comments and/or suggestions. Please refrain from indepth discussions about medicines or other therapies.
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mcconnellmad
Posts: 1
Joined: Sun Apr 20, 2014 3:58 pm

The Guilt of Unhappiness

Post by mcconnellmad » Tue Apr 22, 2014 12:41 am

I know that I have a lot to be grateful for. I tell myself all the time that I am lucky to have been so fortunate, yet I still feel empty. I have heard many of you use the phrase "going through the motions" and that seems very accurate. I feel tired doing everyday activities and then when I go to sleep I'm restless. I just want to feel alive again. Sometimes I feel relief when I burst into tears because at least I am feeling some emotion. Then there is the guilt. Guilt that I've pushed away my friends. Guilt that I am not taking advantage of the life I've been given. Guilt that I'm not happy when I should be. I just don't know if you can make yourself be happy, does that make sense? I even have guilt for posting, because I feel like I'm whining yet this program is helping me to see that my feelings are valid and I have worth. I deserve to be happy and not be consumed by guilt and emptiness. I am still early in the program, and I hope I get better.

randy c.
Posts: 187
Joined: Tue Aug 19, 2008 10:27 pm

Re: The Guilt of Unhappiness

Post by randy c. » Tue Apr 22, 2014 7:29 pm

First of all,welcome to the program.your in the right place.it will get better.do you exercise? i know its very hard to get motivated (at least for me). This website is a great place to find support. A journal is a great way to get things off your mind. Stop by the chat room and tell us what your feeling we love to support each other and it really pick me up to chat. Dont feel guilty about your depression. You wouldnt fell guilty about having a cold or other illness would you? Work the program with confidence. Hey were all in it together, good luck. :)

mtassinari
Posts: 20
Joined: Sun Sep 15, 2013 4:55 pm

Re: The Guilt of Unhappiness

Post by mtassinari » Mon May 12, 2014 12:29 pm

Hi mcconnellmad,

I also experience a large amount of guilt over feelings of despair and depression. I too have a lot to be grateful for in my life, and I find that when I feel feel a wave of sadness or despair coming on (sometimes over something very small, and sometimes for no clear reason), the guilt about having these feelings makes it that much worse. It is really important to be compassionate with yourself and to observe your feelings without judging yourself.

I agree with everything randy says. For me personally, exercise has been tough because for years I have dealt with recurrent injury that has held me back from doing the things I want to do.

I have found writing down my feelings is an invaluable part of recovery, so I will absolutely second randy c on the journaling. I have had consistently had trouble identifying the source of my depressed and fearful feelings (sometimes it seems like they come out of nowhere!) but after writing things down for a few days I begin to gain clarity.

How far are you in the program?

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