I am so glad to be back.
I recently participated in an outpatient program after I got out of the hospital.
The staff and therapists and facilitators were great.
The following is meant to be funny. So don't take it seriously.
It all rings true for all of us who suffer from depression.
My recent diagnosis has been Major Depressive Disorder.
A COURSE IN CREATIVE SUFFERING
presents
12 PROVEN TECHNIQUES TO HELP YOU BECOME DEPRESSED
1. Dwell on Past Mistakes and Failures: This is most effective when you focus on things which cannot be changed.
2. Set Unrealistic Expectations for Yourself and Others: Expect perfection now ! This way you can guarantee failure.
3. Continually Compare Yourself with Others: To get the absolute most from this technique, compare your worst traits with their best.
4. Avoid all Involvement and Responsibility: It would be unwise to try something new and risk success or satisfaction.
5. Remain Negative and Problem Oriented: Spend all your energy and effort criticizing and judging yourself and others. There are always faults to be found if you look long enough.
6. Allow Yourself to be Controlled by People and Circumstances: This way you can dislike yourself for being weak and others for controlling you.
7. Internalize and Personalize the Problems of Others: Believe that you are to blame, and should have the responsibility to make things right.
8. Don't Forgive Yourself for Anything: You deserve to be unhappy. To really suffer, hold long and deep grudges against yourself as proof of your unworthiness.
9. Seek Isolation and Avoid Contact with Those Who Care About You: Be cautious and reject any help offered.
10. Do Everything You Can to Please Others: Believe that your personal value depends on their acceptance of you. You might find that compromising your standards and values for someone else will help you feel even worse.
11. Base Your Worth as a Person on External Things: View such things as appearance, performance and possessions as a measure of your personal value. In other words, love yourself conditionally (with pictures of how you should be ) just keep shoulding on yourself.
12. Seek Lower Companions: Find some real losers and immerse yourself with self-pity and gloom.
LyndaLu
Creative Suffering....
Anyone suffering from depression may post their history, experience, comments and/or suggestions. Please refrain from indepth discussions about medicines or other therapies.
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